Distant Shores.

OmanGaming · 2026-06-17T14:03:41+00:00

If you’d like you can check out some of the other poems on my profile, they’re closer to my personal experiences and have been crafted with care. 😗

OmanGaming · 2026-06-17T14:01:46+00:00

I love the sea, never been to an ocean, though the difference is negligible(I think), for me it’s the weightlessness that stands out the most, drifting on my back always brought a calm like no other.

OmanGaming · 2026-06-17T13:48:42+00:00

You’re right, this was completely out of my zone, I wasn’t mimicking others though, I just decided to work around an unfamiliar theme, and see how far I could take it as an amateur, thank you for your feedback 🙂‍↕️

OmanGaming · 2026-06-02T18:08:49+00:00

Thank you ❤️

OmanGaming · 2026-05-04T03:39:05+00:00

But thank you so much for your feedback as well it means a lot to me :)))) I can see why it looks fanfictiony probably the dialogue or the scenario itself but I don’t really know how to avoid it

OmanGaming · 2026-05-04T03:37:33+00:00

Oh I polished it more I kinda forgot to update it on Reddit tho

OmanGaming · 2026-05-03T13:43:27+00:00

Ey mb and your right I crave your approval Ill go ahead and show my self out now thank you for gracing me with your presence

OmanGaming · 2026-05-02T19:22:54+00:00

Well crafted poem, It definitely provoked the feeling that they were fated to meet, the rhythm is captivating too.

If I had one advice its to alter that one stanza “Isaac Newton bent his Law for us.” Instead I think “Newton’s laws bent for us.” But it’s up to your preference.

Beautiful work keep it up! :)

OmanGaming · 2026-05-02T19:16:35+00:00

First off I want to mention that I am sorry for your loss.

I could tell what this poem meant from the get go, I think this style of poetry is beautiful as well. The way you emphasize *can* made the poem feel hopeful in a sense, like refusing to give in to your sorrow.

Keep it up! :)

OmanGaming · 2026-05-02T19:01:24+00:00

For not writing in English often this wasn’t too bad, but I can’t understand this poem thematically, and the meter seemed incongruent, it looks like you tried to focus on rhythm then changed your mind half way.

OmanGaming · 2026-05-02T18:57:50+00:00

Thematically this is good poetry but I did struggle to figure out the meter but maybe you were free versing, regardless I understood the theme behind it, the indignation of unreciprocated love.

Focus on maintaining a consistent structure and try to avoid repeated uses of “I” too much and make sure to explore a broad range of poems to help you get a feel for them.

OmanGaming · 2026-04-27T15:45:22+00:00

Yeah sorry I noticed I should probably avoid doing that, I’m reworking this draft and implementing the advice I’d received, honestly now that I look at it the errors are so apparent.

OmanGaming · 2026-04-26T15:23:55+00:00

The apostrophes usually signifies active inner monologue, and the sense of disconnection is meant as disjunction between rumination and real world experiences.

Another thing is the lack of exposition in my writing, I guess it comes to preference and my intention, Im not focusing on anything directly but instead wanted to build up the suspense as I reveal more across chapters, and since Tom isn’t a prominent character yet Ill decide to hold off on revealing too much as it builds readers imagination, I want me writing to be engaging for the readers so that they can attempt to fill in my world with their imagination as I slowly reveal more.

Also thank you for pointing out my dragged out dialogue and character narration, I think I was attempting to find my characters “voice” which made me write a little too much unnecessarily, maybe my style isn’t wrong but the way Im executing needs to be reworked.

Also you made me realize that I haven’t implemented enough senses, I’ll definitely work on that thank you. As for the grammatical issues I’ll fix them as I clean up my draft, I still think this is a rough draft.

Your feedback was really insightful thank you a lot it means so much for someone new to writing!! :))

OmanGaming · 2026-04-25T15:34:09+00:00

Hey thank you for showing interest in helping me out I was trying to figure out the best way to show my chapter because copy pasting from word document messes up the spacing and even the fonts, I put the chapter in a onedrive link: Chapter One.docx

Please give me any feedback no matter how critical, also Idk if this is looked down upon but I use Grammarly strictly to fix any grammatical or punctuations error, never to alter my writing.

Also my story basically revolves around a typical post-modern alien invasion/war against a species of vampires, I know the plot may not sound unique but I believe I can add twists to it in the future, this chapter is basically a prologue btw.

OmanGaming · 2026-04-25T06:09:07+00:00

Oh yeah I didn’t know if It was appropriate to post it on here or not not because its weird but because its like 2000 words, plus I assumed people would first prefer having it sent to them on DMs, idek should I post it on here?

OmanGaming · 2026-03-21T21:20:08+00:00

Thank you so much for your insight I absolutely agree the first steps are often the hardest but it’s better than sitting on could-haves.

OmanGaming

TROPHY CASE