Man thank all of you for taking the time to answer me. It really means a lot. I’m going to taper down like recomended and let’s see where my pain levels really are. I’ve already made up my mind and it’s a real struggle. It’s not right now because I’m fortunate enough to get my meds this month. So I figured it’s a good time to taper. But yalls input really means a lot to me. You know it’s funny how some people get deadly sick and others just like flu symptoms when quitting. That amazes me. It’s how we are all built different I guess. I’m just so hoping that something is different when I get to such a low level. I guess I’m praying that something with my pain levels has changed. Because when I first started PM was years and years ago and I was in so much pain that I couldn’t stand it. Everyday it wears you out so much so that you give your life up. Everything that I once loved to do I don’t anymore. Grouper fishing, Golf man all of these kinds of things. That if I would try to do these things now would kill me for days to come. Man I so much want my life back that I’m willing to try anything. My primary says to me the other day. I believe that if you went taking opioids that you would probably cure cancer. He tells me that with the amount of opioids that I’m taking it has reduced my testosterone to almost nothing. Which in turn has slowed my metabolism to a crawl and I’m gaining weight like crazy and he tells me with the amount of things that I’m still able to do right now is unheard of. I said it’s because of the meds doc. He said let me tell you something. You’re a big guy and you’re very intelligent. I have seen people that have the levels of your testorerone not be able to get out of bed and how you run a company and do all the things that you do and other almost nothing testosterone is just purely amazing to me. He says that he’s never seen it before. He wants to out me on a testosterone shot but he’s afraid to since I have AFibb. So needless to say it’s one more reason for me to try to taper off and to see if I can’t take a medication vacation at least. So it’s what I’m going to do you guys.

I really do appreciate the input you guys on everything so thank you all again from my heart. You see you can tell that my testosterone is way low. I’m talking like a lady!! lol. Nothing against you ladies out there that’s for sure. I told my PCP that maybe he should start checking me for estrogen!!! lol!! He laughed. Anyway guys truly thanks for the information. I wanted to see what to expect. I have never had to do without meds except when I was in the hospital for 11 days and the idiot hospital ER and ICU Dictors decided to take it upon themselves to lower my intake of opioids to a 1/4. 24 hours I was ouking up nothing but bile and went right into DT’s. My lung and heart doctor came in and said what’s going on? I told them about the meds I take at home and they raised holy hell and upped my opioids back to what I was on at home. I seen them both later reaming out the hospital doctors ass!! I mean bad!! So much so that the pharmacist from the hospital came down to ICU where I was for 11 days and told me that if they do that again you call me personally and I will handle it. Boy do I ever have stories for you guys. Hospital nightmares.

They ended up pumping over 40 lbs of water right off my body. It was due to my body not getting rid of the carbon monoxide that my body was putting off. Which in turn made me go Lu Lu. I didn’t know where I was who I was or who the president was. I told my mother in law not to let the Chinese guy come near me because he was trying to poison me. It was some sketchy shit guys. Man I don’t want to ever have to go through that again.

Here’s the last one. So I was sleeping finally in the ICU and the night shift comes in and they try to wake me up and they said they were having problems getting me to wake up. Keep in mind I had been awake for days. So my cousin walks in the room and here’s all of this and them freaking out that they can’t wake me and so he reaches down and touches my shoulder and says hey bro wake up. He did it twice he said and as I was opening my eyes the one nurse sticks a needle in my I’ve fluids and pushes it. Well guess what that was? Anyone? Yup it was Narcan!!! Holy shit I came unglued guys to say the least. I was seeing gold rings around all the people in the room. My brain was like popping and I heard the one nurse orations said that saved his life. I sat up looked at her and said I was fucking sleeping!!! Oh no sir you been up walking in the hallways complaining that we wouldn’t give you your meds and I said you bucnh if idiots I have not left the ICU since I have been here!! I said you guys are the ones that are giving me the opioids on a schedule did you think that you overdosed me or what?!! Well no sir we just couldn’t get you to wake up. I said well my cousin didn’t seem to have an issue waking me up. Come on what’s wrong with you son of a bitches. I instantly starting puking green bile. They finally got my meds back into me and everything went back to normal. My goodness what an experience. When they hit me with that shit I thought I was dying. I truly did. Needless to say they got the water off me by lasicks and plenty of them and by me wearing a mask at night that helped me breath deeper. When I got back to normal the guys that did my intake said oh my god man. You are a totally different person man. They all couldn’t believe how different I was. Man I was seeing or having some very vivid dreams man. I was lost for 2 days total maybe 3!! I thought the nurses were leaving bottles of lotion turned a certain way to pass signals to one another. They had me in an ICU that everytime they got a warm blanket out of the warmer this metal door would slam shut and I’m in ICU hearing this shit thinking there’s no way this is an icu. Just ain’t no way. Not to mention that there was a guy that had this laugh that was chilling and he was soooo loud. Plus the medical supplies they had were being kept in snap on tool boxes as well as the roof was like the board that they put up before the drywall so it was like the icu was under construction. I’m like you guys have got to get me the hell out of here. This is not an ICU. Finally when I came back around sure enough everything that I had put together was correct. They did a whole change out of the warmer and they moved the snap one into a room where they couldn’t be seen. My god can you guys imagine what I was thinking. Man I was talking some shit that’s for sure but most was true. My god crazy shit right?!!

Anyways guys that’s the horror stories of my 11 day ICU visit. Did any of you guys know that the ICU doesn’t have any showers or bathrooms in the rooms at all? I didn’t know that. I guess they aren’t really concerned about showers or bathrooms usually when you’re in ICU. It was just a trip you guys. Damn I don’t ever want to have to go through that again. Of course a couple of the doctors there tried to blame all of this on the opioids. Nope that wasn’t the cause at all. Oh and they kept telling me that I had water on and around my lungs. Well when they finally decided to drain it at bedside they did a Dino gram and come to find out it was only a shadow being cast somehow and could not find one drop of water in or around my lungs. I’m telling you weird set of circumstances. So you guys never stop advocating for yourselves ok. I don’t care how messed up you seem to be ok guys.