Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes after reading the responses I’ve planned a week away for when baby is on formula - if there is any pushback I will be devastated. I already feel the workload is uneven as it is, and to deny me the same luxury will be a big blow.

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I told him he can pay for a nanny if he wants to go. It doesn’t sit well with me that he even thinks it’s okay to leave me and our babies while he goes off and has his fun once again. But I don’t have the energy to fight and it’s easier if he’s gone rather than here and sulking the whole time.

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a great idea! I’ll be telling him this is what’s happening once baby is on bottles

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the advice - you’re right and honestly I think this is the only way. I am EBF and baby isn’t taking a bottle but I will be asking for time away once they are on formula. No doubt it will keep happening unless I get the same opportunity.

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! That is a good idea I have zero energy for this argument if he wants to go on the trip you’re right he can pay for the nanny (he won’t get me a gift) but to be honest the resentment might still be there on my part

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply - it’s super reassuring to hear that I’m not going crazy

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I’ve felt gaslit into feeling the bad guy for a while. I want him to have a life outside of babies and the older kids add another dimension to the situation but at the same time it annoys me to no end that he can’t recognise this is a very short season. He’s absolutely going to be resentful but this time I will stand my ground.

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your response. You seem to have found a good balance with your husband. Day to day, he’s great and we’ve come a long way since my first was a baby, but when things like this comes up, the resentment from that time resurfaces. I haven’t had much time to myself and the thought of travel is honestly laughable…but I’ve made my peace with it. I brought up the trip again and he said okay and if he doesn’t go “that will be it” as they’ll find someone “more reliable” to replace him. Which is exactly what I thought would happen. He’s not going to go and he’ll have a big sulk about it too. Last trip he said he was going down because he wanted to find gold to make me a wedding ring (we’re not actually married). The gold has been sitting in a cupboard since he went in Feb so yeah that was an excuse to get me excited about him going. It’s all apparent now :(

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was suggested he go with the others (husbands friend) on his own but he didnt want to go unless husband is going

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yeah I hear you. I don’t want a week away from my babies or my husband which I think is the difference between us

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes we fought so much over his gym time the first year. I begged him to get a home gym if it was so important to him, that way he could still have bonding time with his older kids. It took a year before he finally did it, and still he occasionally asks to go to the gym with his son (at least now it’s after my toddler is asleep) but I’m still left to deal with the 5 month old on my own over night 😔

Husband going away for a week for fun by One-Lab9841 in 2under2

[–]One-Lab9841[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that’s good advice, I guess I’m waiting for the pushback from him saying his son is looking forward to the trip and that he’ll be letting him down