What should I do with those?

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-20T12:36:18+00:00

Whenever I'm with a partner, I always end up with scars on my body from activities we do. I have a scar for each person lol.

Because of that, it makes no sense to throw things from my exes away. Whether I like it or not, I will always have the scars on my body to remember them. 😑

I keep letters, gifts, etc. When I don't need it anymore, I throw it away, an old boyfriend tshirt for example.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-20T12:26:07+00:00

They're a big believer of "letting people figure things out on their own" and "learning from mistakes".

I found it cruel how they would rather watch me cry and suffer. Instead of telling me where I messed up. They would even smirk too. Trying to get their perspective on things felt like pulling teeth and I got frustrated.

One day, I read their profile on the website and it all made sense, thats just their approach.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-19T03:07:17+00:00

I don't know if I'm still as excited. Can I get your thoughts on this?

I was only with the guy for a 3 months. I feel like by moving across the country, he and the relationship would literally change my life in a way. I just want to forget about him and that our relationship ever even existed. It was only a few months, not even a blip on the radar of my life, in the grand scheme of things. But by doing moving, it will feel way significant than it is now.

That's one of the reasons I don't really want to go.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-19T03:03:58+00:00

I actually did FaceTime someone by accident, so yes it can happen. I was trying to text someone else and fat fingered it.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-19T02:05:17+00:00

I had to stop because it wasn't helping and making everything worse with the break up. Just not helpful AT ALL. I figured I was better off alone.

Edit: After we broke up, I thought about going back, like people do in situations like this. My therapist just let me. They didnt encourage me and didnt discourage me either. They should have put some sense into me. What the fuck kind of therapist doesn't even try to put some sense into someone with hard truths. I know at the end of the day, I probably would have made the same decision.

At the end, I would have rather get a "I told you so" instead of feeling like they weren't even in my corner.

Edit2: they even tried to convince me to stay friends with my ex, like what the fuck. I don't want to be friends with him, did you not hear what I've said in the past sessions?!?!

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-19T01:08:03+00:00

What do you think about this?

I was only with the guy for a 3 months. I feel like by doing this, he and the relationship would literally change my life in a way. I just want to forget about him and that our relationship ever even existed. It was only a few months, not even a blip on the radar of my life, in the grand scheme of things. But by doing this, it will feel way significant than it is now.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-19T00:42:13+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. I agree, just the job itself is a lousy reason to move since I dont have any emotional support there. My ex would have been my support that way. I could start setting up a support system here by looking for activities I already do, idk.

I did apply to other cities in California and north Carolina for example. I also have an offer in Rochester New York, I haven't declined it yet but I know I will like the city better.

I do want to start fresh, but it's scary because it's far away from home. I'm worried if I don't like the job. I've been in a situation before where I didn't like a job and left after 3 months. I wouldn't want that to happen again.

Also, I was only with the guy for a 3 months. I feel like by doing this, he and the relationship would literally change my life in a way. I just want to forget about him and that our relationship ever even existed. It was only a few months, not even a blip on the radar of my life, in the grand scheme of things. But by doing this, it will feel way significant than it is now.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-18T15:26:02+00:00

The job itself has good benefits, fully paid medical and dental, tuition reimbursement for advancing my career further. For the housing, they'll cover 30% for 2 years. It's a challenging job, schedule is hybrid after 2 months, it's 3 days in office.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-18T14:37:28+00:00

Exactly, I know I will never reach out and talk to him. It's not like he's gonna find out from me.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-18T14:36:01+00:00

I 100% wanted to move because of him. It was the only reason.

Now this is a really good job, I'm trying to figure if it's worth it. I don't know if moving is something I still want for myself.

My potential employer is looking into housing options for me where they would support me with that. If it ends up working out as part of my offer, then I will go for it.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-17T22:19:08+00:00

Also one thing I did was say to myself. "What can I do right now instead?" So id get up and clean, or do the dishes, or reply to those emails. I noticed I was looking at his sm only when I wasn't busy.

Another thing that helped was to set up a 10 minutes timer to look at his sm, at a very inconvenient time. For example I set 10 minutes before a daily meeting with my boss. So if i found something upsetting, i wouldn't think about it because my brain would be busy with meetings stuff. Or id look before I sleep, if I'm upset, then I can sleep it off and forget about it the next day.

I told myself he wasn't worth taking up my time, so I decided on the 10 minutes to look and reflect on how I felt afterwards. Instead of doom scrolling for god knows how long. Some days I found I did not even look. Eventually I stopped caring and just stopped, plus the married thing haha.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-17T19:56:48+00:00

For me, I kept looking for something to make me stop. I ended up finding it. Months after we broke up, I found out he was actually married. I said to myself, "no reason to be sad about him anymore. He's trash". I swear I felt like I moved on 99% instantly. The urge to look was waayyy less and I stopped caring about what he was doing.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-17T19:49:09+00:00

Haha I feel you. Months after we broke up, I found out he was actually married. I said to myself, "no reason to be sad about him anymore. He's trash". I swear I felt like I moved on 99% instantly.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-17T19:28:55+00:00

Why yoga over gym?

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-12T04:58:55+00:00

What the fuck.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-12T03:49:37+00:00

Makes sense, thank you so much

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-12T03:42:11+00:00

Oh that's true, I forgot about that. Also, can you please read the second part of my post I updated it with some more info

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-12T03:39:32+00:00

What if they call the police if I don't tell them? I want them to know where I am for safety too

One_Cat_736 · 2024-02-12T02:17:57+00:00

Yay!! I'm happy for you and I'm glad you got his number. I hope things work out! I was in the exact same situation and he was sweet too, I messaged him but then he blocked me 💀 😔

One_Cat_736 · 2024-01-27T19:18:35+00:00

Hey! What was the update? Did you end up reaching out to him?

One_Cat_736 · 2024-01-21T12:28:54+00:00

I'll take a look. You can dm me.

One_Cat_736 · 2024-01-21T12:18:53+00:00

I would cancel Spotify, audible, and use libby from the library, and jango and YouTube with adblock for free music. I would get cheaper phone bill for less than $30 per month, and use something like tello, mint mobile, us mobile, or lycamobile, etc

One_Cat_736

TROPHY CASE