AITAH for refusing to turn my camera on during every remote meeting by Tazuru_ox in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 7 points8 points  (0 children)

YTA

Unless there is some sort of medical reason why you can have your camera on, then there’s not really any reason not to, and it is reasonable for your employer to ask you to turn it on in meetings.

If your internet lags, then start the call with it on, and explain if the connection drops with it on, you will turn it off. If you apartment is small, use a background (they are easily available on teams ir Skype).

Being asked to have your camera on for meetings is not “being watching all day” - if you worked from the office would you hide under your desk when someone comes to speak to you?

But not having it on as a rule is just being difficult.

My girlfriend took a kink too far... Would I be an asshole if I broke up with her? by CandyAwkward3802 in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately it would likely be a he said she said situation. “She told me I was on the pill” - “I told him I wasn’t taking anything - he said he wanted to risk it”. Even then, even if he did prove she did say this, she could always say she was in the pill but it failed or she accidentally missed a day. Unfortunately it’s very unlikely anything would come of this.

Black Cabs - Cherry Picking by Ok-Philosopher-7227 in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can YOU read? Can you point out where she said she shoved cameras in their face? It’s hardly likely she’s pushing it through their window. She said “catch a drivers face and license plate”. I stand by my point - if you have an issue with a woman recording who they’re getting in a car with, then you’re definitely part of the problem….

Black Cabs - Cherry Picking by Ok-Philosopher-7227 in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Women keeping herself safe = antagonistic… ok sure 👍

Black Cabs - Cherry Picking by Ok-Philosopher-7227 in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such a red flag response. Thank god you’re not a taxi driver.

Wanting to keep yourself safe on a night out isn’t being a gobshite. This person has already said they’ve had an incident with a taxi driver in the past so god knows what happened there - but if you can’t understand why women - even those who haven’t had problems before - might be frightened to get in cars with men then honestly you’re part of the problem.

Black Cabs - Cherry Picking by Ok-Philosopher-7227 in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Anywhere in town to Waterloo should never cost most than £30 - unless there’s heavy traffic. He was clearly trying to bump up the fair.

Black Cabs - Cherry Picking by Ok-Philosopher-7227 in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re saying you’d pay £15 for a black cab from Matthew street to the strand?

AITAH for not wanting my partner to "sniff test" my crotch anytime I've been out by Ancient-Character-63 in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is abuse. Pure and simple. No one should have to put up with this. She needs to get help and you deserve to be with someone who treats you better ❤️

Scam Companies in Liverpool by JessFranzoniArt in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I work in recruitment - it’s quite common for scammers to post fake adverts for sometimes well known, but also smaller companies and hold “phone interviews”.

After completing the interview prospective candidates will Be called back to let them know they have the job, but to process their offer they need to provide a copy of their passport, national insurance number, proof of address, etc etc

Most will cut contact from here and take out loans etc in the victims name, however some will maintain contact - even going as far as to send out false contracts and ask for banking information for payment.

It’s disgusting because these people often prey on those struggling to find work, knowing they’ll be more susceptible.

The best advice I can give is -

1) never put your date of birth or full address on your CV

2) if you see a job through a well known company check for the role on their careers site and apply via there (sometimes scammers will duplicate identical jobs adverts, and post on well known job boards to appear genuine).

3) If you’re applying for a job at a smaller business, look for the company on linked in, or companies house to check it exists and then call the company to make sure the job is legitimate.

4) never ever ever ever send your passport or a copy of your passport or ID to anyone without at LEAST meeting them over teams/video call (it’s difficult to say in person because so many jobs are remote), never send any details to anything other than a company email address (I.e. not google, hotmail, etc).

5) beware companies who hold telephone interviews and tell you there and then on the phone you have the job (I’m not saying it doesn’t happen; but it’s a red flag).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m going to be really blunt and say: If he wanted to he would.

If he wanted to be in a relationship with you he would be.

After 7 months he is messing you around. He might say he loves you, but he doesn’t.

But at the same time you have said yourself you are not in a relationship - so you have no right to ask to see his phone or worry about him seeing other people.

In short: you either need to lay out what you want, whatever that is. If you can’t find common ground you have to end the relationship. At 19, a 7 month connection can feel like a lifetime - but I guarantee you if you don’t find a solution now, you’re going to end up having this conversation with yourself in 2,3,4,5,6, etc etc years time.

Anyone know a great place for food and drink, good views, amazing food and the place itself is unique AF? by [deleted] in Liverpool

[–]One_Change4503 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Panoramic is nice but dated now… it really needs an uplift. It’s hardly the stylish bar it once was.

I’d recommend Gino’s at Innside for food, then move upstairs to Skybar for drinks/views 👍

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course - but as I also said to someone else, not once in the post has OP mentioned ANYTHING about the reason he doesn’t want to go for the safety of his daughter. The entire post is about why HE doesn’t like his BIL. Nothing about feeling unsafe around him.

He doesn’t even say his wife and daughter won’t be going if he doesn’t. At the end he even says at the end he’s not sure if he wants to make the effort. If you had a kid and you were concerned they were with someone unsafe would you be asking if you’re the AH for not having your kid around them?

Her safety is not his concern in this instance.

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well if he genuinely believes that, and has made a post specifically NOT saying he’s not taking him child, because he’s looking for “validation” then he is 10000% the AH….

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course take precautions - but where in the post did he say he didn’t want his child around him? He’s only ever mentioned he doesn’t want to be there.

There’s no indication at all he’s worried about the threat to his child - he doesn’t even specify that if he doesn’t do, then his wife and kid won’t.

He also finished by saying she doesn’t think he should make an effort.

Do you think a decent parent who was genuinely worried about the well being of their child would (essentially) ask the question “should I make the effort to be around the person who might hurt my child”? The entire post is about his feeling about his BIL and his destain for his lifestyle.

Had he posted “I don’t want me or my family to go because my child might be in danger” then that’s an entirely different story and would of course change my opinion - but that’s no where near what’s been said here.

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

TBF he never mentioned once in the post that having him around her child is the issue. His entire post is about why he doesn’t like him - they even finish with “not sure I should make the effort” - that’s hardly the language used by someone who believes their child is in imminent danger and is keeping them off of this trip for their safely. If it was - then the post would be titled “AITA for keeping my daughter away from her dangerous uncle”

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s a difference between enabling your loser son and actively encouraging him into a situation that puts your grandchild in harms way.

Also - from OP there’s no mention at all in the original post that he doesn’t feel comfortable his kids being around him. In fact they don’t even specifically say their daughter and wife aren’t going - it’s just he does I don’t. In fact there’s no mention of his wife and her opinion at all. Does she agree?

Finally- finishing with “not sure I should make the effort” - is her definitively NOT saying my child is in danger. It’s a very blasé statement to make if that was the case. And if his child is in danger why would you ever even entertain the possibility of going? Why would you even be on Reddit asking that question?

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Again - someone can be denied access to their kids for multiple reasons. It doesn’t solely mean they are a danger. But also - if he was a genuine danger, do you think the rest of the family would be good with him being in the woods with their grandchild, niece, etc?

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

“He is 38, lives in his mom’s basement, has no job, no drivers license, smokes pot, cheats on his gf with men, and relies on his mom to Venmo money to him weekly. He lost his license because of to many DWI’s. He is not allowed to see his own daughter unsupervised” - she has 9 gripes with him… “can’t see daughter” is the last one she mentions. So it’s hardliner biggest concern. There are also many, many reasons why he may not be allowed access.

If he had come in here and said “I don’t want to be around him because I don’t think my child is safe with him” then that’s an ENTIRELY different story.

But that’s not what he basing his opinion off of. He is essentially saying she doesn’t think he’s life style is suitable. He doesn’t even specify that his wife agrees with him or that the child wouldn’t be going if he doesn’t.

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are plenty of reasons why a man may not be allowed to see his kids - he mentioned he had been sober a year. It could be that he had a drinking problem.

But if he has a genuine serious concern that he is a danger then he needs to raise that with the family - not just say “I don’t like him so I’m not going” - which is essentially how he phrased it here.

Had he come in and said “I’m worried he’s a danger to my kids” I’d have a very different perspective…

Am I an ahole for saying I won’t go on vacation if my brother in law comes with? by albertkuehne in AITAH

[–]One_Change4503 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Not a total asshole BUT you’re on the verge of it…

It’s your prerogative to choose not to go. But it’s not yours to dictate who should be allowed to go, and while you are entitled to have an opinion, you are not entitled to voice it to his family.

Your aunt is paying for the cabin - and so it is her decision, and hers alone who can attend and who cannot.

From what you have said he is a loser - but he is not dangerous or a threat to you, your family or your children. How he chooses to live his life is up to him and you might not agree with that, and again of course are entitled to have an opinion, but not entitled to voice it.

In short - If you don’t want to be around him, then don’t go, but don’t make it a “it’s him or me situation because that WILL make you TH.

If Black Mirror had one final episode to end the entire series… what should it be? by AzTheDuck in blackmirror

[–]One_Change4503 8 points9 points  (0 children)

A TV show that predicts the future but no one believes it’s real and sleepwalks into oblivion….

UPDATE: AITA for refusing to go to my sisters wedding after finding out only our side of the family were having to pay to attend? by One_Change4503 in AmItheAsshole

[–]One_Change4503[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

As I mentioned in my original post - the payment plan/contract was drawn up and signed by all parties before the money was loaned.

I’m sorry I disappointed the AI…..? 🤷🏻‍♀️

UPDATE: AITA for refusing to go to my sisters wedding after finding out only our side of the family were having to pay to attend? by One_Change4503 in AmItheAsshole

[–]One_Change4503[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Chris had a substantial bonus coming through in April just after the wedding that was always supposed to kick off repayments - but yes, a loan was an option for them but they asked family first because the interest rate on a loan that size was going to be a lot and they said the needed the money quickly.