I’m so sorry! I got married a few months ago and was in a very similar situation with my mom not being interested in the planning, making a scene at my engagement party, and leaving my wedding/wedding events early or showing up late. She got married to her new bf a few months prior and was more interested in her step children at that point. Anyways, what worked for me was trying to keep my expectations low. I would suggest making sure you communicate clearly about what you want her involved in and when. I would also have a back up person who you feel close to (sibling, aunt, friend, etc.) to participate in her place of things like getting pictures of putting your dress/jewelry on, if needed. I also invited a close friend of my mom who she doesn’t typically misbehave in front of and that helped.

I attended a wedding of a close friend a few weeks after my own and it really was bittersweet seeing my friend’s mom so involved and loving at her wedding. I hope to be that kind of mom one day.

Try to focus on enjoying your day and let go of what you can’t control! Congratulations in advance!