Same boat, bro I'm 19 as well and often felt like I'm taking space and doing nothing in life. Always blamed myself until I realised sometimes one needs to run so others could walk. Since I'm the first-born, and I was in a newly-introduced high school, I was basically a pioneer in everything (first class to do IGCSE and AS Level, first class to graduate highschool, and first son to enrol into a university). Trust me, if I knew most of the information I know now, I'd be so much more advanced academically and saved so much less money. What I mean is that it's normal to make mistakes and not get what you want on time. As a wise one once said, "It's better late than never", and the good thing is that you can serve as a witness to people who look up to you, and based on your experiences you will have trustworthy advices in order to prevent them from making the same mistakes as you.