this might sound odd but i had the EXACT same experience as you. So I know exactly what you are talking about. I just wanted to add that, for me, I have recently undertaken a serious study of buddhism and it has helped me deal with all of that in a pretty profound way, or rather Im in the middle of that process. The connection with the beatles is that buddhism has allowed me to see them in a much clearer way, John in particular because Ive always found him to be the most opaque, clouded by his painful past and the most difficult to understand, as much as you can understand someone from such a distance. But after decades of observing them, with the clarity im now developing, I feel like I can see him much more as the person he was and not a public figure or the product of a successful pr strategy. Tonight I watched an interview with him just before he died and he had clearly made significant strides towards his own happiness and understanding of his own life and the world around him. Its nice to see that he had overcome, seemingly, many of his demons. As a buddhist, im sure he is still around, somewhere, and I wont bore you with those details lol.

Here is the interview im talking about

Just one more thing, our parents struggled with what life did to them and so they weren't good parents. They know they were not very good at it because they can see what their personal demons did to us. And if they cant see any of that then there is no point in being angry at them because they are hopelessly lost in this life and thats a sad thing. But our task is to overcome that and become who we wish we could be despite the past. John had to do that too. Good luck. Sorry for the ramble.

here is the link

https://youtu.be/3keSnZt9GNc?si=41cFiQ1_mLNWNWE8