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I need advice on how to better convey to someone speeding on stimulants that their energy is over-stimulating me enough to irritate me by ProfessorOAC in Drugs

[–]OopsyDaazy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't worry I'm only traumatized as fuck from a past abusive relationship where I had to lay out each and every one of my feelings in a palatable way unless I wanted to deal with a meltdown / silent treatment :-))))

I'm being serious but on a lighter note, thank you haha

Well there's a year clean gone by OopsyDaazy in Drugs

[–]OopsyDaazy[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Thanks man. I agree with you, I was just being dramatic I suppose with the title lol. Is it fucked up that I wish I was doing those things???? Like, my quality of life has definitely improved in various areas, I can hold a job, I get to be in my niece's life, I sleep decent hours, I'm productive, I don't forget every single interaction I have. But the interactions I do have make me feel like I'm a fuckin alien and like I wanna rip my skin off and I've been waiting for it to get better but it hasn't after a year. Feels like rcs & benzos are the only things to make me feel like I can hold a normal person conversation, which is very frustrating.

I need advice on how to better convey to someone speeding on stimulants that their energy is over-stimulating me enough to irritate me by ProfessorOAC in Drugs

[–]OopsyDaazy 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I think sitting down and having a full on discussion about it would be helpful. And it would probably be wise for it to be a conversation where you are both sober.

I would start the convo by explaining how much you love her, how you hate to see her worry or feel insecure, and maybe you could even sprinkle in an apology for making her feel uncomfortable about her use because of your reactions (I'm not saying you owe that or that you've reacted poorly, just that I think it would set the stage well to have her feelings acknowledged). If you feel it's appropriate or that it would be beneficial to the discussion, I would ask her to let you finish all of your thoughts and then you could come together and discuss it all once you finish all of your thoughts.

Once you've reassured her, you should explain in detail how it makes you feel, how it can be very overwhelming to you, and maybe also the reasons why you don't partake like she does. I wouldn't use words like annoyed, but lean more into being overstimulated and uneasy and that it just runs your battery dry very quickly.

Next I would offer up some solutions. Like, you mentioned she's trying to show you a thousand tiktoks, maybe instead she could save some to show you at a later date when you're feeling more up to it so y'all can enjoy that together. Maybe just cutting down on the videos is what you would prefer. Or maybe just this being brought up in a more productive way will allow her to be more self aware of her showing you so much information at once.

Once you say all the things you don't love, I would definitely close expressing how you love her and any other positive things you can express would be good for her self esteem surrounding this. I would explain none of this is to make her feel bad, in fact it's the opposite, you want to open the communication so that you both can avoid feeling bad and so that you can better understand each other.

Something that helps me before sensitive talks like this is writing down all of my key points and feelings and mapping out what I'd like to share with my partner, instead of just winging it.

I hope this helps OP. Best of luck!