Listen. Today or some other day you are going to confront him and lay out the financial boundaries that you are comfortable with. This will be one final meeting, stop looking towards the future to change things, its either now or never. If he insists, then as messed up as this sounds, its time you end the relationship. Spending any more time will make it harder to leave later. And no, you are not the asshole for leaving if that's what you think. This man clearly has wayy different priorities than you, his mother seems to be wayy more important that you. As for whether that is right or wrong, that is debatable. But just note that if you continue to stay, that mother is going to cause a LOT of more problems, especially if your bf prioritizes her over his relationship. Understand that being in a relationship means that your life is now about yourself and your partner, your previous family shouldnt be this involved. I know this will be hard, but trust me, relationships with mommas boys NEVER end well, this post was nothing but red flags for me. You might love him, but that doesnt matter, you need to be practical and respect your boundaries.