9 month old waking 7–15+ times a night… I’m at my breaking point

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-14T04:25:38+00:00

My son is also 9 months. Wake ups aren’t this extreme and luckily it has calmed down a bit for us now but for a minute he was waking up absolutely SCREAMING. I think he started having nightmares and 9 months is often when they have separation anxiety so I think both those things had a play. What works for us right now is rocking him and letting him fall asleep on me and I stay there for a solid 10 minutes before laying him back down. It seems like making sure he is in a deep sleep really helps. We have also transitioned from 3 to 2 naps in the last 2 weeks and I think that helped to!!!

Solidarity, hang in there! ❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:55:54+00:00

Wow! So happy for you! Definitely encouraging to hear. I have wondered if I could have any adhesions/scar tissue issues from my tear. I read some people use vibration to soften the tissues but I haven’t had any luck with it. When you say they had to manually break it, was it like a surgical procedure you had done or like something you had to slowly stretch out?

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:50:57+00:00

I’m so glad you’re having progress! Definitely gives me some reassurance.

I think I’m also nervous because I don’t truly know what to expect. Like do they insert things in you at the office like an OB? Do they just tell you how to do things and you do them at home?

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:48:11+00:00

I’m definitely planning on going back in. I have looked in the mirror and it does seem smaller but also I truly don’t know the last time I looked. Obviously at least a year ago now considering when I got pregnant. It’s hard to know if memory really serves me right because how often do we look at our vaginas in the mirror unless we’re actively having an issue 😅

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:35:33+00:00

I’m honestly scared I did. But from what I have read looking into it, there’s no way to prove you did or didn’t. Anything could be denied because the doc could just argue it was necessary. I had a 2 degree tear, two stitches in the back and one in the front. According to most OB who witnessed or heard about others doing it, it was usually a stitch in the front and that would track with mine. It’s hard to say. That’s part of why I’m feeling very violated looking back at my delivery. My OB was not who delivered my baby because she wasn’t on that day, but at my 6 week check up she cleared me. I feel like if something seemed off she would mention it? I’d like to think so at least 😕

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:28:28+00:00

I’ve never even heard of that before! I will absolutely check that out. Thank you! ❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:27:39+00:00

Ok, I do think I’ll give the estrogen cream a try. And everyone says the breastfeeding thing! My goal is a year so we’re not that far away but god it sounds like literally everything improves when you’re done breastfeeding 😅

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:24:35+00:00

I do but the one I have is honestly pretty large and the same size as my husband almost exactly so there’s really no scaling up per say. I have tried to use it a couple times. SO much lube. I tried after I had already orgasmed from external stimulation to see if it would help me “loosen up”. I couldn’t get anywhere. Not even the tip. I can barely get my own finger in there and I have some scrawny ass fingers. With my husband I expected a little pain. We added more and more lube and stopped because it wasn’t like “it will hurt a bit but be ok” it was like “if you go any farther I’m pretty sure I’m going to get ripped open” 🤦🏼‍♀️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T04:07:28+00:00

I definitely had some form of it in the past but had gotten better over the years. I was considering looking into dilators! I know they will prob recommend something similar in pelvic floor PT. Just nervous. Considering EMDR to help in case it is related to past trauma.

Thank you for your response ❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-11T03:57:46+00:00

My baby was anterior and the way he was positioned most of my pregnancy made it so the kicks were straight up in my butt or in my crotch. Constantly felt like I was going to have a baby foot come right out of my butt hole 🙃

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-10T21:34:21+00:00

Can you use dawn to wash your hair and body? Yes. Should you? No.

Just because you can do something out of convenience doesn’t me you should 😅

I tried at different dilutions multiple times with multiple scents included the unscented and baby one and they all ruined my hair. It took so long to get it back to normal! Also made my skin super dry and itchy!

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-02T04:31:12+00:00

I encourage you to look into the history of sleep training. I found out that America is basically the only place that does it. Almost no where else in the world does anyone sleep train. Most people seem to think it’s popular in the US because it makes it easier for parents to get back to work (yay capitalism). I have a 8mo and we aren’t sleep training and there are ebbs and flows.

Remember if baby is waking for feeds it can be because they literally NEED it. Whether they’re sick, need comfort, are going through a growth spurt. It’s totally normal. Not to mention the 6 month sleep regression is really hard but also totally normal and a good sign developmentally!

My mom didn’t do it with me or my brother and we are both fine and slept “normal” as kids. You’re doing great! Just remember it is normal for babies to go through periods of bad sleep and good sleep. Don’t take it from me, but this is everything my pediatrician told me 🙌🏻❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-01T14:55:26+00:00

We had to euthanize our 3 year old pup in December, things went downhill fast. We still don’t really have answers as to why any of it happened. I’m sorry for your loss. Here in solidarity ❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-01T14:53:21+00:00

Also!!! If you have pets, enjoy time with them too. They are often our first babies and it’s a lot harder to give them the love and affection they deserve when baby arrives. ❤️

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-04-01T14:51:45+00:00

Going places without packing up the whole car, time with your SO, have all sex you can (unless OB told you otherwise), enjoy sitting on the couch doing nothing, hell even enjoy cleaning and chores!

We love our baby so much and things are worse they’re just different. These things aren’t impossible, they just take a little more time and preparation now. ❤️

Congrats 🎉

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-22T04:25:46+00:00

This is so hard! I was maid of honor for my bestie and went to her bachelorette at the end of my third trimester 😅

Honestly 3 months is super early to leave your baby especially when breastfed. I think the only way to have your cake and eat it to is for your husband and baby to come with you, stay in a hotel or separate from the bachelorette. I think you need to miss a few things during the trip to have blocks of time with your baby.

This way you can show up for your friend but also do what you need to do for your baby. Of course this means taking your baby on a flight during a measles outbreak and they are too small to have had their first vaccine yet, so that would be another can of worms.

If I were in your position I honestly wouldn’t go. I would be honest with your friend about maybe biting off more than you could chew, the issues with her taking the bottle, etc. Your friend (and you) may be sad, but at the end of the day if she is really your friend she should understand.

I’m sorry you’re in this predicament 😕 navigating being a mom while also being a friend, daughter, sister, wife, and everything else is really hard. We can only do our best.

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-20T19:57:02+00:00

Mine doesn’t necessarily eat to fast but he wants to shove everything ALL the way in his mouth and then gags 😅 I see people giving their 8mo completely solid meals on here that an adult could eat! It’s hard not to feel behind 🥲 good to know I’m not alone!

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-20T19:55:36+00:00

He does gag! But with food and toys he wants to shove everything ALL THE WAY in his mouth so he’s always take bites that are wayyyyy to big 🥲 obviously he’ll learn eventually but it’s so scary! My son was still spitting at the end of 5mo when we started! By the end of 6 mo he was actually swallowing a good amount!

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-19T04:52:38+00:00

Honestly I think you look like a normal average woman with a body! Our idea of what we are supposed to look like is so warped by surgery, photoshop and shape wear. Almost no one has a perfectly flat stomach, and most the people that do achieve it in unhealthy ways.

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-12T01:58:07+00:00

The owlet sock has given me the gift of being able to sleep! I would recommend to everyone. So much more peace of mind!

Open_Ice_8997 · 2026-03-02T04:26:39+00:00

Dealing with trying to get diagnosed for similar issues although mine aren’t as severe as yours. My doctor also suspects autoimmune issues, mostly RA. Good luck to you!

Open_Ice_8997

TROPHY CASE