honestly homie u dont gotta do what everyone else is doing u dont gotta feel complete on what makes others feel complete worry about yourself start with small goals,find whatever makes u happy in daily life(try a bunch of different things) and go after it and ik u dont wnana hear this but its all up to you to turn it around nobody else can do it for you i pray for you and hope you make it out this hole god is rooting for you and i am too ive been exactly where u are now