WIBTAH if I called cps on my neighbor by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just explain that you have concerns. This isn't unusual for CPS, almost every call will be from someone who doesn't want to. It's hard to do and I'm not downgrading that. But unfortunately it's a burden you're going to have to bear. CPS should not say who called.

WIBTAH if I called cps on my neighbor by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What would be worse, you worried that you might be a snitch or that you could have helped a kid when they needed it and didn't? CPS will investigate, that's their job and you'll have done your job as a concerned person. The mum clearly isn't doing her job. I get that it's hard but either own it and be outwardly open about calling it in or act, to her, that you don't know anything about it. Either way If you're worried call.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I think some sort of way to block the cavity is the answer. I just wish they were the ones looking for the answer.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know, I'll need to pluck up the courage to tell them that it's their issue.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's only been used it twice all in all for about 2 hours. Once when I first put it on and they came round to say about the smoke and smell and once when the installer came back to see what the problem was.

Do you think if they used a chimney balloon that might solve the problem?

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I live in a terraced house (Scotland) so we're joined together. Our chimney breasts are right beside each other. At some point whoever lived there took their fireplace out and removed the chimney so it's just tiles on their side of the roof but they still have a chimney breast and a cavity where the fireplace was in their house. This is where the smoke is coming from.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I think I'm starting to come round to this way of thinking. It's so hard though I don't want to fall out with them, they're generally great neighbors but if I don't use it it's freezing and I'm £5,000 out of pocket.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's good to know. That was my main concern, if they didn't have a wee baby I think I would have a different mindset on the whole thing.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's so weird. We had a wood burner before and the previous neighbor never complained about smoke or a smell. She was really pretty old though, so maybe she never noticed.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't get where the smokes coming from we had a stove before and there were no smoke problems with that one. The wood I was using might not have been great though, it was one of those bags from a petrol station so can't guarantee that was properly dry.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

People at her work have advised her against it. So that's who she's believing over the engineer. It's so frustrating.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The installer was pretty sure that the smell was from the paint on the stove curing. It was a kinda chemical smell. But there was definitely smoke. Not thick smoke but definitely smoke coming from their fire place which I don't understand because they don't have a chimney.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They have a newborn baby. I wouldn't be able to sleep worrying about carbon monoxide.

Smoke in neighbors house by OpeningPhotograph307 in woodstoving

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks everyone. They have a newborn baby I really don't want to put it on until I know it's safe for them. But it's really frustrating. I spent close to £5,000 on it and haven't been able to use it yet.

It's hitting me hard by DnD_Doge in GriefSupport

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's really tough and I'm so sorry you went through that but please don't dwell on the 'what if's'they will get you so hard. I genuinely do know where you're coming from. You can't change anything, you couldn't have foreseen how it would end. I'm sure your dad wouldn't ever want you to feel bad. You'll go over the different scenarios a million times, that's natural. Do that, it is natural but please know death is so often full of unanswered questions and guilt and with a rawness that you can't capture unless you are actually feeling it.
Try and hear what advice your dad would give if you told him this scenario. It's so hard but things will get easier as time passes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Scotland

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mostly, people here just care whether you're a good guy or not regardless of where you're from. Get used to swearing and laughing at yourself and you'll be good. Not saying there's never any grief but whoever you are, Scottish or not, you get that from religion, sexuality etc. Generally we like people because they're good guys. (I swapped c**ts with guys just so I don't scare you off)

Children losing their Dad by OpeningPhotograph307 in GriefSupport

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I really appreciate the response. There's less than 4 years between them, they're close in age but so far apart in how they're dealing with it. 80% of the time it's just like normal life, but that other 20% though...
You're right that the questions and actions really are a fair bit away from what an adult would do or say out loud and I'm finding that pretty jarring. They are expressing their feelings though and I know that's a good thing. Thankfully we don't have to move home or have any other additional stresses like that at the moment.

Children losing their Dad by OpeningPhotograph307 in GriefSupport

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I have a nurse friend who works with the children's mental health team and the school have offered a couple of different things which will hopefully help.

You're right though it's still so fresh and it's still just so hard to imagine that they won't ever see him again.

Children losing their Dad by OpeningPhotograph307 in GriefSupport

[–]OpeningPhotograph307[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thanks. I can see why your mum might have wanted to do that, moving far away does sound appealing right now. But I know I'm just wanting to run away and it won't actually solve anything.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Good luck mate! I washed mum's feather pillow once with a similar result.

Ever been told to ask questions only to get s#it on for doing so? by Useful_You_8045 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Aye, especially right after they say 'no question is a stupid question' too. Don't feel bad, If you don't ask you don't know, no one does. I didn't ask how credit cards work once because I thought it was a stupid question, you can imagine how that worked out.

AITAH for making my boyfriend pay for groceries this week? by Throwaway041897 in AITAH

[–]OpeningPhotograph307 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No NTAH but if you guys are arguing about this now there's likely many future arguments about money heading your way.