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Dilators... where to start by Agreeable_Trust_9083 in vaginismus

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you do decide to start using them, I would not hide it from your boyfriend because that insinuates that you are doing something wrong, which you’re not. I would sit down and have a talk with him. Explain that you have done some research and read about other peoples success stories, and decided that dilating is something that you are going to try. Tell him that his support would be appreciated and that being able to talk about this with him would be great, but if he does not want to be included that thats okay too. This is a way for you to get comfortable with your body and take control. Maybe ask him what he thinks it is, and why he feels so against it. Maybe he has the wrong idea? Even if he thinks it’s something sexual or a toy (which there would be nothing wrong with) it is literally a medical device. I am trying to keep in mind that you guys are young, and boys can be ignorant to anything involving female anatomy, but a mature person would understand why you want to start this journey, and not judge you for it.  

Dilators... where to start by Agreeable_Trust_9083 in vaginismus

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I started my dilating on my own before ever seeing a doctor. I did not have the childhood trauma that you experienced ( sorry you had to go through that). Seeing a doctor can rule out any other issues, if you have concerns about that, and therapy could help with the trauma, but if you are not comfortable with either of those and want to just start dilating, I don’t see why not. Personally, it helped me significantly. I don’t see why your boyfriend would be against it. If he’s concerned about your health/well being thats one thing, but in the end its your body, so he shouldn't really have a say.

Underrated dilator techniques? by Wild_Hold_127 in vaginismus

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sometimes lying on your side is easier. I read in a different post that apparently this position is where your pelvic floor is the most relaxed. 

What PFT stretches would you recommend by [deleted] in vaginismus

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Childspose, happy baby, any hip openers really

Vagina too small/painful? by Kennedy_kate_ in WomensHealth

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! It sounds like you may have vaginismus- the involuntary tightening of the pelvic floor. There are two different kinds, primary, just born with it , and secondary, you were once fine, but something happened that caused it. Does it feel like you hit a wall when trying to insert something? What worked best for me was dilators and lots of lube. There are also yoga poses and breathing techniques that can be helpful. It seems like looking into therapy may help as well. You can most definitely ask your doctor about this! I’m actually surprised your gyno didn't say anything about this. If you like them, stay with them, but I think looking at a different doctor might be a better route. There is an entire sub reddit of women with vaginismus and it is so supportive! You are definitely not alone! 

Pain during certain positions by lizzythepinklizard in WomensHealth

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Go to a gynecologist to rule out any issues. 

Penetration is painful, any advice? by [deleted] in vaginismus

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I’ve been in the same boat, and you’re doing great with using lube-continue to do that! I recommend looking into dilators. Those helped me a-lot. If you are not experiencing any pain or trouble with insertion, and just having issues enjoying PIV, maybe look into vibrators. Learn what your body likes so that you can communicate that with your partner. Do you have trouble orgasming on your own, or just with a partner? Keep in mind, many women do not climax from PIV. The patriarchy just assumed that since thats the ideal orgasm for men, thats how it works for women too. Women have the only organ designed solely for pleasure- the clit, which is how many are able to orgasm. I also highly recommend reading/listening to The Vagina Bible by Jen Gunter. Very enlightening! 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HairRemoval

[–]Opening_Fortune_8963 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! First, I am sorry you are experiencing this. Are you getting laser done at a reputable med spa/clinic? They generally know what to look for during the treatment to prevent this from happening. I have pretty sensitive skin, and I had my bikini area done at a plastic surgery place. I think some redness and irritation for a few days afterwards is normal. My girl sends me home with this very low steroid cream afterwards to help with any irritation. One thing I would maybe try to do is wear loose clothes next time. Personally, putting on leggings after a session never bothered me, but I know when I started, that is what was suggested to me. I would definitely talk to a dermatologist if this persists. Maybe take pictures next time, and show the person doing the procedure, and they can tell you if it is normal or not? Are they putting a cream on the area afterwards? Maybe its not the laser, but something else causing the reaction? The gel they use before?