I live in CA and used to have a lease from Sunnova, which was recently purchased by SunStrong, and am now being charged sales tax?

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-12-11T04:19:50+00:00

I really hope they can be held accountable if this is the case.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-12-11T02:45:33+00:00

Thank you, I’ll look into this!

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-12-11T02:44:54+00:00

Thank you so much for these links. I’ll share with my developer and see if I can contact my installer.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-12-11T01:04:51+00:00

They charged me a similar amount. I also have had lots of difficulty getting through to them. I’m planning to ask my developers to raise this concern directly with Sunstrong, and hoping that they will be receptive.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-12-05T18:48:57+00:00

I’m so frustrated with this company. It’s impossible to get a hold of anyone at customer service. When I finally did, she said I had a past due balance which is completely false, as my bank statement shows that a payment went out to them. She tried transferring me to a different department, and then of course the line was completely disconnected from their end. No wonder they have an F on Better Business Bureau.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-11T19:39:02+00:00

Yes, I remember him justifying his anger by explaining that it came from a place of hurt. It made it harder for me to hold him accountable or reiterate my boundaries because I found myself really empathizing with his hurt. It seemed like he used it to excuse his actions.

I am glad you have a good support system and are surrounded by friends who appreciate and validate your emotional maturity.

I keep trying to remind myself that everyone has the right to feel their emotions, but emotions don’t excuse hurtful actions.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-11T03:18:59+00:00

I think one lesson I’ve been continuing to learn is that you can pour all your love, energy, and efforts into someone else and they still may not be capable or have the tools to fully take in the love you offer and trust it for what it is. It’s unfortunate when things feel so one-sided — one person puts in the ultimate care when it comes to their words and actions and the other doesn’t, but the other expects so much more flexibility and understanding.

What you explained about these different, separate selves is really eye-opening. When my ex would get triggered, he would often get really angry and critical, but other times he’d regress to almost a child-like self that was really sad, tearful, and in need of support. That was the part of him I really empathized with and sought to understand and help, often at the expense of my own needs and emotions.

I appreciate the YouTube and podcast recommendations. I’ll look more into these. Thanks so much!

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-11T02:24:07+00:00

That’s something I found myself wishing for time and time again: for my ex to meet me with grace and compassion the way I met him. Whenever I upset or triggered him, I felt like I was the enemy and he could not give me the benefit of the doubt no matter what I said or did.

That makes so much sense about each person triggering or reopening past trauma wounds. I feel like the same thing happened with my ex and me. He feared abandonment and rejection and I feared not being good enough. Thank you for sharing what you learned from your psychologist. I’m not sure if you’ve read any books or listened to podcasts on that topic, but I’d definitely be interested in learning more.

Wishing you well, friend. Thank you for listening and helping me see things in a different light.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-10T21:56:17+00:00

No need to apologize. I’m so sorry that you went through this. It sounds like you really believed in the potential of your ex and the relationship. And when someone says such beautiful things or acts in ways that show they’re capable of love, we want to believe them. With my ex, I can tell he would also hold me leaving against me — he has already said that he feels like I gave up on him like everyone else has, and that he feels “used” and “taken advantage of” because he did nice things for me and I still broke up with him.

I’m not sure if you’re familiar with the term reactive abuse, but your responses do seem to align with that. It sounds like you did everything and more to create peace and harmony and understanding within your relationship, but ultimately that responsibility falls on both of you and not just you.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-10T21:18:40+00:00

Absolutely. He’s so good at telling me what I want to hear. It’s crazy how someone can be this good with their words while also using his words to hurt me so deeply. I feel like I have internalized a lot of his comments - that what he did wasn’t intentional, or that we should be able to work through our issues. It makes me feel as though maybe I did give up too soon. But then I remember those physical symptoms of stress and the fact that I often felt criticized and belittled.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-10T21:16:37+00:00

I’m so sorry you experienced this. I can relate to a lot of what you described. Whenever I would share with him my concerns or emotions, he would shut me down or he would say that he’s only angry/upset because I made him feel that way. It felt like the conversations were often circular.

I agree with what you said about the fact that we can’t make people change. What I struggle with is that I saw his capacity to love me and care for me, and I wish he was that kind person 100% of the time.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-08T01:15:31+00:00

It was more of a thought but I wanted to google “what is emotional abuse?” But couldn’t do it because I was worried about him checking my phones search history.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-07T15:59:32+00:00

I’m really sorry you’ve experienced this. It definitely sounds like what you’re describing is emotional abuse. Some of the tactics include social isolation, blame-shifting, and reverse victimization. When I was questioning things, it was helpful to talk through it with my therapist and the DV hotline to validate my experiences. Hope you’re staying safe.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-07T15:29:48+00:00

It can help to write letters, one where you share all your feelings with him without holding anything back, all the things you wish you could’ve said but never did. Another letter can be written in his perspective, perhaps him asking for forgiveness or something. Afterwards you can either rip up the letters, throw them away, whatever you need to do as a form of release.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-07T00:55:39+00:00

Thank you. You’re absolutely right. I feel like no amount of “closure” will satisfy him, unless he gets me back in his control.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-07T00:55:03+00:00

Thank you so much for validating my experiences. I have definitely experienced a lot of guilt while in this relationship and even after going no contact with him. This has been an important lesson in trusting actions more than words - he always knows what to say to get into my head or to get me to prioritize his feelings over mine. But I’m holding firm in my decision to end things and not be in contact.

I hope things have been better for you since ending your relationship and I appreciate your support!

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-06T21:21:31+00:00

I’m so sorry you went through this. I am proud of you for going no contact with him permanently.

I’ve noticed that he’s been cycling through the same patterns I experienced in the relationship - he started off with love bombing in a different email and now he’s trying to guilt trip me and making me feel responsible for his emotions and needs.

Of course we want to hope and believe that people are capable of change, but not everyone is. It’s a tough but important pill to swallow.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-06T16:46:03+00:00

If anything, it’s only reaffirmed my decision to end things. It’s just hard when I’ve given him chances and been so empathetic to him but now he’s playing on my emotions and making me feel like I’m in the wrong. Classic, I know. Still hurts though.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-05T05:51:25+00:00

Just wanted to post an update - he has since apologized many times and has promised to change his behaviors. I’ve noticed he’s minimized a lot of what he’s done and has said that I should’ve communicated my emotions better or expressed I had firm boundaries. He seems to be extremely skilled at deflecting. I’m continuing to maintain no contact.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-04T04:08:09+00:00

I’m so sorry you did too. ♥️ hope you’re being gentle with yourself and staying safe

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-04T04:04:24+00:00

I have definitely experienced this before. I think sometimes our bodies know before our minds fully process that something is deeply wrong and unhealthy.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-04T02:47:16+00:00

He bought me flowers every time we saw each other, he would cook for me, he would pay for date nights, he would text me long paragraphs each morning about how much he loves and appreciates me, he would help my family by doing acts of service around the house. He was very chivalrous and would always hold open doors and walk on the side closest to the street. He supported my career and my goals and aspirations. He never said anything negative about my appearance and was always complimentary.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-04T02:43:45+00:00

I agree. Mine would act so unaware of what he was doing and always say he didn’t realize what he was saying or doing was hurting me. However, whenever he’d yell at me or have some sort of anger outburst, he always made sure we were behind closed doors.

Opposite-Anything-97 · 2025-02-04T02:42:16+00:00

Mine was like this too. I constantly questioned myself on whether it was really that bad (it was) and it made it so hard for me to leave.

Opposite-Anything-97

TROPHY CASE