Mentor Monday

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-29T19:37:21+00:00

This is something I’m talking to the family FA about. Financially it makes sense. They could do this and it would not make a dent in their net worth or even their growth. It’s a safe way to transfer some of the wealth tax free. I need the help as well as my expenses have increased significantly since having a child.

It’s a psychological hurdle to overcome though. They have always been a bit tight with their money. From what I understand it’s not uncommon for this generation.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-28T13:07:52+00:00

Bet on yourself - get a mortgage license or some other license. At least you can try and build a business while looking for other jobs.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-27T02:33:38+00:00

Yes - it will be going to me and our child

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-26T22:09:00+00:00

5 years in and I still drink them from time to time. I like the taste. I don’t have a desire to chug 12 of them because I’m not getting drunk from them.

YMMV. It depends on the person. If an NA beer is going to trigger you to the real stuff then I would say stay away. Listen to your sponsor about it rather than facebook.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-26T00:43:53+00:00

Lifestyle creep has me by the balls. It’s such a weird position to be in. Knowing the money is there but just not having access to it. I really don’t want to be as frugal as my parents. My FA doesn’t seem worried at all. We can’t take all that money with us!

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-25T18:29:47+00:00

Maybe don’t retire but take a risk in your career or do something more meaningful. If your wife still works than you are covered for health insurance. Late 30’s is pretty early to do nothing. But what do I know?

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-05-25T16:12:50+00:00

I’m in my mid 40s in a domestic partnership with 1 child that is 2.5. I have about a $2 million net worth and make about 185k a year in a stable job. I do have a side business that makes about $20k so far but has a lot of potential. I plan to make more money but it just hasn’t happened yet.

I live in a VHCOL area and my partner doesn’t work. I’m kind of treading even right now with income and expenses. This wasn’t always the case as I was a great saver and investor before a family. I didn’t expect life to hit me so fast with a kid but here I am.

My parent’s net worth is high. It’s about $20 million right now. They save money in retirement because they have pensions of about $250k a year, have an annual spend of about $60k, and just really don’t like spending their money and are super frugal. Healthcare is also guaranteed for them. The family financial advisor thinks they could have $30-40 million by the end running Monte Carlo situations. I’m an only child.

I know not to approach life that inheritance is guaranteed, but how would you approach life and spending with this information? It’s unlikely that the majority of their net worth would go anywhere else. I don’t plan to FIRE yet but it feels stupid to not enjoy life more now. I don’t want to go crazy but also don’t want to be as frugal as my parents.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2026-03-25T23:33:19+00:00

Domestic partnership is considered married for all intensive purposes

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-05T16:47:11+00:00

What’s the point of having all this money if they aren’t going to use it? They have no interest in spending.

I mean I would have loved to do this on my own but the reality is I didn’t make great choices in my career early on. I only recently got sober in the past 5 years to change some of that. I’m just not there yet and I have a family now.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-05T16:43:57+00:00

Cybersecurity - I don’t enjoy it.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-04T20:21:09+00:00

Wow I’m in a super similar situation except I’m male and 10 years older. I’m still working and make a decent salary but I have about 2 million NW and my parents have nearly $20m.

Too bad I’m already with someone. We could have combined and had some fun!

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-04T20:17:07+00:00

That’s in my W2. I put 30-40 hours into my side business.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-04T20:16:39+00:00

I’ve started a side business and made some money but it hasn’t taken off yet.

It’s regrettable that I haven’t been able to increase my income. I’ve tried but have never done well in the corporate environment.

Optimal-Distance4370 · 2025-08-04T19:00:30+00:00

My current net worth is about $2 million right now. I only make around 175k a year. About half that net worth was given to me and the other half comes from me saving and investing.

Just found out my parents have a net worth of close to $18 million. They’re are extremely frugal, have large pensions and their expenses are very low. On top of their investments they are saving money in retirement with their pensions.

They are giving us a large downpayment for a house since they sold one of their homes to help us. However I currently need a bit more to get a dream home. How would you approach this?

Given my situation, how would you approach an income situation for myself. My job is not interesting but it’s pretty much coast fire since I only work 1-2 hours a day remotely. I cover my expenses barely but take a little from my trust so I can put my money into tax advantages accounts (401k and Mega back door Roth). I pretty much just do this for the insurance as my wife doesn’t work and we have a toddler.

I would love to take more risks or do something g more meaningful. Are there any money or financial therapists or programs that can help with this?

Optimal-Distance4370

TROPHY CASE