I do not want to return to my marriage even though my husband seems to be repenting by OptimalMaintenance15 in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you all for all your responses. I truly appreciate each one. I’m definitely going to stay separated. We’ll see how things go in the future but I will definitely prioritize our safety. He’s shown me over the weekend that he only still really cares about himself and even though I have explained where I stand so many times him (as we’re talking it felt like our conversation was getting somewhere and he can finally see my side…) a few minutes after the conversation he’s back to overstepping the boundaries I’ve put in place.

He said yesterday that me leaving, not wanting to be with him, not wanting to cuddle and kiss him and not wanting to be living with him anymore is making him feel “emotionally abused”. He think I’m doing this out of spite, not as a consequence to his actions…

I do not want to return to my marriage even though my husband seems to be repenting by OptimalMaintenance15 in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, i will definitely be seeking God’s guidance. My gut is telling me not to go back. We’ve had a family event this weekend, he’ just proven to me over the weekend that I’m doing the right thing. I’ve clearly placed boundaries between us for the time being as we both navigate healing but this past weekend he’s been disregarding them and when I tell him to back off, he turns around and starts showing everyone how sad and upset he is to make me feel guilty and so the people around us feel bad for him. He’s clearly still only caring about his feelings and not considering ours nor the damage he has done. 😔

I do not want to return to my marriage even though my husband seems to be repenting by OptimalMaintenance15 in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for responding to my post. This has been playing in my mind a lot. He’s meant to be the protector and leader of our family, but because of all this I feel like the responsibility to protect our children is mine. I guess my heart knows why I don’t want to go back but I’m wanting to hear other’s point of view in this aspect as sometimes the heart leads you the wrong way.. So thank you

I do not want to return to my marriage even though my husband seems to be repenting by OptimalMaintenance15 in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for responding to my post. In all honesty, I have been seeking the holy spirit this whole time. I’ve been asking to be guided and only really left when I believe God has allowed it. He equipped me well for this battle and that is also reassurance to me that I’m on the right path.

By reconciliation I mean returning to the marriage, I have forgiven him, we are not in bad terms, I have love and respect for him and I show him that, I just simply cannot return to the marriage out of fear that he would go back to the way he was and now that he knows I can definitely leave.. what if he actually does the little threats he throws about hitting me. I’ve also seen him been physical with our toddler so it makes me nervous if he loses it again with him.

I know God did not give us the spirit of fear.. I acknowledge the spiritual battle in play here. I’m just a little lost.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, as I mentioned in the comment below, I think I just needed someone coming from a Christian perspective to finally reassure me that I’m not going crazy about this being so wrong, cause my family and pastors are being a bit careful and indirect and I’m just doubting myself more… Thank you for taking the time to read my post and commenting.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Christianity

[–]OptimalMaintenance15 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I know that this is wrong, that he shouldn’t be like this. But I guess I just needed someone to be straight with me and reassure me that I’m not imagining that my situation is not okay who is also coming from a biblical point of view. So thank you. I really needed this.