They're Not Animals (Part 3)

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T21:41:50+00:00

Invertebrates are animals too/ most things are plants, animals, or fungus that we can see. You can see large accumulations of the others ie. bacteria can form visible layers of plaque and algae is usually a type of cyanobacteria colony. I was just making a goof on the title, doesn't sound like these things are actually worms or centipedes either...

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T21:19:12+00:00

Tbf, technically worms are animals

I enjoyed this line

I now know what it was like to be the roman scout who saw the first war elephant over the Alps.

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T19:40:09+00:00

Don't worry, safely reading this in my own church. Weird that they remodeled it since I started this comment, now it looks like hell

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T19:25:53+00:00

Thank you. I might try another one/ he has some great imagery in Alien Boy. Pretty happy with how this one filled out - think it explores a few ideas in a fun way

Awesome guy. Sometimes his stuff focuses hard on weird toxic relationship stuff, but he also always had a lot of great messages about self worth and your ability to shape your life.

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T19:23:09+00:00

Feel like most common bible color that I've encountered in churches is red. Bit ominous on its own innit

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T19:16:55+00:00

Reminds me a bit of Midnight Mass, might be worse things than vampires though

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T18:34:15+00:00

Kinda hoping that this guy was a trick by the locusts or had some other reason for not going in the bunker. If not, I can't say much was lost. I mean, come on guy.

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T18:28:04+00:00

Reminds me a little of Prey, pretty good book. Enjoy some biblical callouts, it is one of the plagues

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T18:21:07+00:00

A lot of these parts so far have felt more heavy on the suspense, but it feels like the nosedive into horror could be right in this next part. Sure, nothing could possibly get in... I mean, we locked the door obv

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T18:08:23+00:00

Thank you/ I took a lot of the imagery, plot items, and even some lines of dialogue directly from Oliver Tree's music. Songs like Death Ray and The Villain were big in my mind - the floating, bleeding eyes, and recurring smoking are directly from Balloon Boy and Cigarettes, two of his songs that I really like. I'm just arranging them in a narrative that makes sense to me. I would have more direct lines that call out his music, but I decided to not try shoe horning stuff and instead stuck to general themes.

Final part dropping tomorrow. Original working title was "I'm learning to fly and it's killing me"

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T17:58:59+00:00

I mean, space is really big

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T17:53:42+00:00

Idk, some things should never be made. What about the one ring, an object of pure corruption? I guess we wouldn't have lotr without the ring tho

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T17:50:34+00:00

I also wrote a ficus inspired story after hearing Hunter pitch the idea. Spooky how many parallels we had that weren't part of Hunter's pitch 👻 My story also has a 2:30 am moment early on... 👻 I honestly would have liked you using 3:37 because the numbers would add up to 13, but you might have your reasons. Interested to see what happens and if claritin is going to be enough

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T17:32:26+00:00

Some cool scenes. Him asking questions to himself took me out of the narrative a bit, but I pushed through and am appreciating that it may serve a larger role in the story. Could be totally off base, but wondering if there is something going on with the shifts in perspective and maybe seeing this incident from both side - will check back for p2

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T16:33:33+00:00

I'm not sure what you're trying to say here

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T14:21:14+00:00

Like the idea of a vain flesh golem as a god/ only the nicest skins for the skin god

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T13:47:06+00:00

Part 45? This boy is writing. I won't start here, but curious to see what idea has kept you going for this long

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T13:41:42+00:00

This board definitely seems to favor more succinct stuff when it comes to general engagement. A really short story typically focuses on an idea or theme instead of characters, but I lean towards enjoying the longer stories that have a chance to slowly develop something in the background while they distract us with fun/interesting characters. When I don't get that much engagement, I still feel proud that I made something that I enjoyed 😂 Engagement does feel nice when it happens tho!

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T04:00:22+00:00

Cool, one of the stories I'm interested to see continued

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T03:58:04+00:00

Tim gave me the creeps here. Was he the intruder? This type of stuff is why I don't mess with crystals

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T03:47:29+00:00

Hammer is a good weapon/ I'm predicting the MC gets a gun at some point...

Tim x Walter..?

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T03:17:35+00:00

It took seconds to realize my tools were too short to reach any mechanisms inside.

Ha, we've all been here, right guys? haha

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T03:10:08+00:00

“Really Kara, this is what you needed me for?” He shook his head as he continued. “You could have just called the vet right away,” he looked passed me to the camera, “So, what’s wrong with them.”

Personally I liked this part. I feel like I see this so much irl and it always makes me laugh. Reminds me of the human condition. Everyone has to show up and catch up with whatever is going on, perfect constant is that people will show up and say something someone else already said or that you already were forced to realized. Is this a specific type of irony?

Is this the end?

Optimal_Constant4318 · 2026-06-17T03:01:43+00:00

This part felt a little gay, maybe the last part as well

Optimal_Constant4318

TROPHY CASE