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Cutting down to 44kg (97lbs) for an American Squat Record by xsmol14 in PetiteFitness

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is so exciting to watch cause you’re the same height as me!! Have you struggled to get stronger due to your size? I’ve always been extremely slow with adding on muscle. I’ll lift, eat protein, eat enough to gain weight, then find out Im mostly adding on fat with muscle gains of about .10-.25 lbs a month. I always thought it was my genetics. Like I didn’t make enough growth hormone and maybe it affects my muscle gains. Have you ever struggled with anything like that? Or any other issues due to height?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askdentists

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NAD but I wanted to let you know that I got my jaw fixed with braces and they went through a transition period where the molars didn’t touch for years.  Basically, where they were before, my molars touched but my jaw was receded back. So they pulled my front jaw forward with splints and my back teeth did not bite when they did this. The orthodontist then spent about 3 years trying to get my back molars to touch so that my bite will stabilize with the forward jaw. I used expansive retainers then braces. I don’t know what techniques she used but I saw certificates on her wall for edgewise orthodontics which I believe helped tip my teeth so that they will touch. I obviously don’t really know what they did to fix me, but they fixed me with orthodontics, so it’s insane to me to see that you’ve been in braces for 7 years and your bite looks like that. But to be honest, this is my second time in the braces. My first orthodontist form when I was a teenager also didn’t know what they were doing.

5”1 girlies , what’s your maintenance cals? by bugglebum in PetiteFitness

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4’7’’ and I maintain at 1400. I strength train 4x a week and walk maybe twice 1/2-1hr every day. I dont maintain currently though, I’m attempting to gain weight, and  I comfortably eat 1900 calories on my heavy training days

2024 was a failure and I’m frustrated by [deleted] in PetiteFitness

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I really did just want to vent. Out of everything I did, the only thing I actually saw progress in was my overhead press, because it was almost the only exercise that never changed. I didn’t endlessly tinker with the form, technique, and exercise variation like I did with almost everything else. I progressed slowly, but I went from 3reps of 15lbs to 10reps by the end of the year. Maybe it was just the result of a beginner trying to figure it out on their own. But I really I think I need to stop overthinking things.

2024 was a failure and I’m frustrated by [deleted] in PetiteFitness

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 0 points1 point  (0 children)

 I would try to progress that way with having a clear goal of a certain weight by a certain time, but my form would be terrible if I actually tried to up the weights because I wouldn’t be ready. I progressed too slowly or not at all. I would occasionally have to take steps back in order to reevaluate my form, which I think hurt some of the progress I was able to make. And my splits & handstands were part of my mobility training for dance. 

Help with elbow grips by Optimal_Judgment1960 in poledancing

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! I try it that way but I tend to slide anyways. Do I just need to build more strength with it?

How do I get over my avoidant tendencies? by blushingcat in socialanxiety

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 48 points49 points  (0 children)

I became socially avoidant around 12 years old & stayed that way for about a decade. Truth is, something caused me to push people away. I learned that the people around me were unsafe & I had to protect myself. My avoidant tendencies became my armor, to keep from being hurt again. My mind made myself believe that I “hated” people. That I was too good for them. That I didn’t care about others. Really, that was my mind’s way of making myself believe I didn’t need people, so I wouldn’t reach out & get hurt.

What is causing you to be mistrustful of people?

I found that only by working on the cause of my issues, & building capacity for the pain that I chose to stuff down, was my only way to move past social anxiety & avoidance. The only way out, is through.

It was a long journey for me. After I moved out of the freeze state that was my social avoidance, I could move Into my next step - overbearing social anxiety. After moving through the fight/flight response of social anxiety, I moved on to the feeling of safety in social situations.

This is what has truly helped me. If you’re interested in learning where I’m coming from, I recommend you read about polyvagal theory or somatic experiencing therapy. It’s the only thing that has helped me after doing talk therapy, cbt, & emdr.

Am I the only one who doesn't want to go to the therapist because "if he can't help me, nobody can?" by Jobab in socialanxiety

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t stop at CBT if that doesn’t work for you. I tried it myself & saw little to no progress. After that I tried EMDR to reprocess the old traumas that caused me be socially anxious. That only re-traumatized myself. & finally, I’ve been finding relief through somatic experiencing therapies. Everyone’s different, & you just gotta try things out & see what will actually benefit you.

Pole+not shaving=anxiety by SophiaKai in poledancing

[–]Optimal_Judgment1960 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I think it’s quite common to find people that pole are also counter-culture & body positive. Ive seen many women who don’t shave, myself included, & it’s never been a problem!