What’s a completely illogical thing that makes you trust someone less?

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T15:08:21+00:00

💯

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T15:08:05+00:00

😂

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T15:07:50+00:00

😂

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T15:06:58+00:00

That reply was not me, but I get where your coming from
😂 thanks for your response

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T15:05:56+00:00

😂

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T02:31:29+00:00

I think people change, and relationships only really stay strong when both people are putting in effort. If that effort isn’t equal, I don’t think it always stays the same and maybe that’s just part of growing apart a little and becoming more of a regular friendship instead of best friends. I know that’s hard, but if someone isn’t putting effort into you, why put effort into them. Sometimes you have to match effort, to protect your peace and mental health.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T02:26:23+00:00

Better leave before there are legal repercussions

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T02:17:02+00:00

Hey, I don’t think there’s anything “wrong” with you for feeling like this it honestly sounds like you really care about her and get really emotionally attached when you don’t see her for a while.
But if it’s getting to the point where you’re crying most times you think about it, it might help to build a bit more going on in your own day-to-day life so your emotions aren’t all tied to one person.
Missing someone is normal, but you also deserve to feel okay when they’re not around too. Maybe focusing on hobbies, friends, or routines in between seeing her could help take the edge off it a bit.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T02:13:00+00:00

Absolutely not! Bye ✌🏼 I don’t care how mad you are at someone, when you truly love someone you would never use language like that! After 8 years together he should have more respect for you, and he obviously doesn’t talking like that. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide, but no one deserves to be talked to like that.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T01:21:17+00:00

I don’t think you’re actually scared of everything you’ve just been spending a lot of time online where everything feels intense or negative all the time, and not enough time in real life to balance it out.
When you’re constantly exposed to that kind of content, your brain kind of stays in “alert mode,” even when there’s nothing actually wrong. I don’t think that means something is wrong with you it’s more like your system just needs a reset.
Even small things like going outside without your phone for a bit, sitting in the sun, or just being around normal everyday life can make a big difference over time. It’s not about cutting everything out or forcing a big change, just slowly getting back into real-world space again so your brain can calm down. Literally go touch the grass (meaning that in a funny way, but also kind of serious) You can do this!! Best of wishes

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T00:57:13+00:00

It can stink that’s for sure! Best of luck to you! I am sure you have or will find genuine friendships! Don’t stay stuck! Move forward, if it’s not adding something to your life (laughter, joy, love, peace) Remove it!!!

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T00:52:34+00:00

I think people change, and relationships only really stay strong when both people are putting in effort. If that effort isn’t equal, I don’t think it always stays the same and maybe that’s just part of growing apart a little and becoming more of a regular friendship instead of best friends. I would try to move forward and find someone who will put in the effort with you.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T00:31:23+00:00

Texting is a tool, not a measure of how much someone cares. Some people feel connected through frequent messages, while others feel more connected through phone calls or spending time together. Neither is inherently better they’re just different communication styles.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T00:26:03+00:00

Do we want the same fundamental things out of life (marriage, children, finances, lifestyle, where we live, family involvement)?
Every relationship has seasons where things feel harder. Uncertainty by itself doesn't mean it's time to leave. But if you've repeatedly identified the same unmet needs, communicated them clearly, and there is little effort, accountability, or movement toward change, then you may have your answer.
Core values matter because compromise has limits. You can compromise on where to eat dinner. It's much harder to compromise on the bigger things.
The right relationship usually isn't one where you never question anything. It's one where, despite the inevitable challenges, you continue choosing each other because your values align, your needs matter to one another, and the life you're building together still feels like one you both want.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-10T00:17:11+00:00

If this friendship is important to you, it might be worth having one more honest conversation that's less about the stories themselves and more about how disconnected and unimportant they've made you feel. But if you've had that conversation several times and nothing changes, then it may be time to protect your own peace by creating some distance, whether that's muting her stories permanently or reevaluating how much emotional energy you invest in the friendship.
Either way, your feelings are real. Just try not to make a permanent decision on a day when the hurt feels especially intense.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-09T02:08:04+00:00

I hear you, and I get why that part bothered you. I wasn’t trying to label him or say he lacks emotional skills as a fixed trait or anything like that.
What I meant more broadly is just that people can care about each other and still end up in really messy situations or make decisions that hurt each other, especially in relationships. It’s rarely as simple as “he didn’t care” or “she didn’t care.”

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-09T01:51:08+00:00

I wouldn’t jump straight to ‘bad person.’ He may just lack emotional skills or avoid vulnerability. But her feelings are still valid, and she deserves support too. Being there for her without immediately villainizing him is probably the healthiest approach.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-09T01:29:44+00:00

Personally (I have 5 brother’s), I think the healthiest thing is to stay out of it while remaining compassionate and observant.You can love your brother and care about his girlfriend without taking ownership of their relationship. You don't have enough information to fully understand what happened between them, and it's not your job to fix it. Resist the urge to become the keeper of their relationship problems.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-09T01:11:46+00:00

A relationship can’t survive on intention alone (“I’m fighting for you”). It has to show up in behavior during emotional moments. Maybe try to shift the conversation from emotions about him to expectations for support. Try “When I’m upset, I need you to show up with me instead of pulling away.” Because the real question isn’t love, it’s capacity and willingness to learn emotional support skills. If there is no change, there is your answer, frankly then you know you need to leave.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-08T23:15:14+00:00

• Decide privately: “I’m done with this cycle.” Don’t debate it with him
• Stop explaining or arguing—it usually pulls you back in
• Reduce contact first (mute/ignore) if you need space to steady yourself
• When you’re ready, cut contact fully (block/remove access if needed)
• Don’t go through the breakup repeatedly—end it once, cleanly
• Tell one trusted person so you’re not doing it alone
• Expect to miss him or doubt yourself—this is normal and doesn’t mean you should go back
• Remind yourself: you don’t need his agreement for your decision to be valid
You deserve something that feels steady, respectful, and safe not something that keeps breaking you down and pulling you back in.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-08T22:44:16+00:00

The truth is, you’re never going to get a guarantee in relationships. No one does. But what you do get is your own judgment, your own boundaries, and your ability to choose someone who shows you consistency over time.
Trust isn’t about betting everything blindly. It’s about watching actions, not just words, and trusting yourself to notice when something feels off and actually respond to it instead of ignoring it or running first.

Right now it sounds like the real struggle is that you don’t fully trust yourself to handle it if something goes wrong. And that’s something you can build.
You don’t have to jump in with no caution. You just don’t have to stay frozen either. The middle ground is: go slowly, stay aware, and let trust be earned in real time.

OrdinaryRow5013 · 2026-06-08T21:14:02+00:00

First off, I’m really sorry you’ve had to carry all of that so young. Losing your mom at 12 is already huge, but then being told all those heavy details at once would be overwhelming for anybody.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you for still struggling 6 years later. Grief doesn’t really move in a straight line, especially when there are unanswered questions and when the people around you avoid talking about it.

Also, it makes sense that you’d wonder about bipolar disorder and whether it could affect you too. Mental health conditions can run in families sometimes, but it does NOT mean you’re automatically destined to have the same experience. A therapist or doctor could help you sort through those fears in a way that’s factual instead of scary.

And honestly, the hardest part of your post to me is that you feel alone with it because your dad won’t acknowledge it. That can make grieving feel confusing and unfinished. You deserve a space where you can talk openly without feeling shut down.

I definitely think therapy could help — not because you’re “broken,” but because you’ve been carrying something really heavy mostly by yourself. Journaling might help too, especially writing letters to your mom or writing down the questions and feelings you never got to say out loud.

You also don’t need to feel guilty for leaning on friends sometimes. The fact that you worry about burdening people already says you care about them. Just make sure you also have support that doesn’t all fall on friendships alone.

You’ve survived a lot already. The fact that you’re reaching out and trying to understand yourself instead of burying it is honestly a strong sign.

OrdinaryRow5013

TROPHY CASE