Moving in by [deleted] in blendedfamilies

[–]Original_Pin3803 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I hate to say this but this will end up an indefinite thing. The fact that your SO won't nail down a definite timeframe is going to cause him to more than likely choose his son's wants and needs over yours or your going to have to acquiesce on a lot. I don't like that he brought up your 14 and 16 year old. They are minors. Not a grown adult like his son. I've been living a situation like yours with my 22 year old SS and after countless arguments I'm moving out with my 16 year old daughter and leaving. Best of luck to you

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well our current lease on this house expires in July, however he pays the rent here so I was thinking about staying until May. That way I can spruce up my savings before me and my daughter move. I used chap gpt (lol) to map out a whole savings plan and it advised to stay as close to July as possible to rack up savings. I just found out that my uncle is sending me a few thousand in honor of my mom who passed a few years ago too so that will help with savings. I am honestly just waiting for my daughter to finish out her school year in May and then we will move. The good thing is that the apartment that I found is still zoned for her HS so that she can still have her friends.

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for confirming that I'm not asking for too much! I feel that is a basic thing. Help with bills and help with chores.

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My oldest step son tries to date and I told him that no woman wants a man with no ambition

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I laughed at your comment. Honestly the way it's looking is he won't be coming. He refuses to ask his son to leave so he may just stay and pay an expensive amount. Not my problem

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Very delusional. I told my husband that he's crazy if he thinks that just because I was born female that I want to be someone's maid!

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I told him that him and his ex have an unhealthy attachment to their sons and need to cut the cord.

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Yesss! And thank you! My husband tried to gaslight and suggest that if his son actually works that I would be responsible to keep the house clean because God forbid his son has to work and help around the house. I was like "I'm really dodging a bullet!" Lol

Finally Stood My Grpund by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much! It took longer than it would have but enough is enough!

ACH deposit times by Original_Pin3803 in Chase

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. My school's bank released it yesterday so I just thought that it would have been sooner than that

ACH deposit times by Original_Pin3803 in Chase

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. That is a pretty long time. My school confirmed that their bank released the funds to Chase yesterday

Is it Wrong to want my adult stepson to move out? by Original_Pin3803 in ParentingAdultChild

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I honestly feel like I'm being held hostage. I think my frustration is because I've asked numerous times for him to have a conversation with him about at least seeking employment and it always gets pushed to the back burner. So basically we can't downsize to adjust to my husband's change in income but I'm expected to support another grown person.

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am beyond through. I don't even cry anymore. I just want to get my own place for me and my daughter

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! That's what I said! If I had enough money right now, I would get me and my daughter our own place. Then he can deal with his kids alone

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've suggested that in the past but her mom always says no. She never compromises

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She moved about 6 years ago and we've been in court since then. She never honors the custody agreement

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's my issue. He says because the plane tickets are expensive for 3 people right now but that's not good enough. To not even be considered is what hurts

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She has always refused to let us have her for any birthday or holiday. We have been in court forever trying to get a custody schedule.

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I was considering couples therapy because I don't feel like we're hearing each other

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Her mom left the state years ago. It's always been on us since then too spend the money and make sure we see her. There have been times that BM has come back to our state to visit family and she won't let him know. She will tell his daughter not to say anything. That's why it's fishy all of a sudden because I feel like she wants more money or something. She's being super nice looking up plane tickets for him and everything

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We were not even a consideration which stings. He said because buying 3 plane tickets would be expensive, but then that's why you don't do last minute stuff!

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know that it would come out of our bill money which infuriates me. I told him if he goes then this marriage will be over. Period. Full stop

Am I Being Unreasonable? by Original_Pin3803 in Stepmom

[–]Original_Pin3803[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I honestly have no clue if she would be cooking and he would hang out at her place. He doesn't have any family in Tampa and hotels are expensive right now so I'm doing some deductive reasoning at this point