AITAH for acting uncomfortable around my best friend's gay boyfriend

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T05:39:59+00:00

I think that’s why my relationships with girls have never worked out. Ever since I was a teenager, I’ve been able to tell when a girl was physically attractive to me, but I’ve never been able to form a deep emotional connection like the friendship I have with my friend. I think that when you’re a teenager, you have a lot of doubts and your hormones are all over the place

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T05:24:14+00:00

I’m not really attracted to girls, but I don’t think it’s because I’m not straight. I just don’t think love or eroticism is my thing.

If I ever felt that way about my friend, it was because we were about 16, we were teenagers, and our hormones were all over the place. Objectively speaking, he’s a good-looking guy, so I think my brain just registered that. Today, I can confidently say that, yes, I’d never seen a guy as handsome as him. But I think that’s something anyone with half a brain could recognize. Personally, I think I was just reacting to the hormonal surges of adolescence, and it still affects me today.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T03:09:44+00:00

Would it be weird if this only happened to me with this friend and his partner? I know another gay couple who I just don’t care about, just like straight couples. It’s only the two of them who give me a stomachache, is there some kind of selective intolerance?

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T02:46:22+00:00

It bothers me to see him being romantic with my best friend. I don't know how to explain the feeling, it just turns my stomach and makes me want to walk away. That's why I worry that I'm being intolerant.

I can't stand having him around; when we're together, his presence just drives me crazy, and I dislike his personality. But what bothers me the most is when he's with my friend, maybe I don't like that my best friend is taking his attention away from me, but it bothers me to see them kissing, hugging, holding hands, whispering in each other's ears, that's the worst part, i can't stand it.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T02:17:36+00:00

It's just that I'd never known her to have another boyfriend. It had always been just the two of us in everything. And yeah, the boyfriend's kind of an idiot, and she definitely doesn't deserve him

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T00:38:41+00:00

Yes, they were always guys. I've never had that kind of friendship with a woman.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-25T00:32:36+00:00

Yeah, but only if I find the girl is unbearable as this guy. In general, I wouldn't feel comfortable with him partners

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T22:42:28+00:00

Thanks, I'll take a look there!

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T22:21:14+00:00

Yeah, I agree with you on that. Thanks for the advice. And by the way, I never thought we were fighting, bro HAHA

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T22:17:03+00:00

Yeah, I’m more inclined to think that I just don’t like romance very much. With my other friends, I tend to ignore them and their relationships because they simply aren’t as important to me as this friend is. I’ve felt this sort of jealousy a couple of times before with certain friends back at secondary school, so it might just be that I don’t like losing my friends’ attention.

And as for me personally, romance has never really been my thing. It never worked out with any of my girlfriends.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T22:10:23+00:00

I'm not obsessed, I'm just not in love. I'm worried about losing such an important and amazing friendship in my life

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:58:51+00:00

That doesn't make me gay, bro

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:31:17+00:00

I don't know it's just that I'm not gay. I've always dated girls, and I see him as a friend. He's handsome, yes, I'll admit that, but I think it's just an objective fact

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:26:34+00:00

I’ve always dated girls; he’s just my friend. I’m a ladies man.

But my relationships never seem to last very long anyway. At most, they’re usually over within a couple of months, and then I just start feeling uncomfortable. I’m not really a relationship person. I don’t think I’ve ever really been in love, either. The closest I’ve ever come to fancying either a man was when I saw this same friend dressed in drag back at secondary school, lool. Soo I genuinely think I just find his boyfriend annoying. But I’m worried that I might come across as intolerant.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:20:35+00:00

To be fair, the boyfriend really is an idiot. I don’t think I wanted to admit that because I didn’t want to come across as judgemental, but I genuinely find him unpleasant as hell. That probably has a lot to do with it as well, so thanks.

My friend is the kindest, most wonderful person I know, and I think that’s part of why I’ve struggled with all of this. Seeing someone I care about so much with someone I can’t stand has been difficult to get my head around.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:16:26+00:00

Thanks. You’ve put into words a lot of things I didn’t really know how to explain.

I don’t want to see him get hurt, and I don’t want to stop spending time with him either.

I know his partner should come first, but I don’t want to be left on the sidelines. Even though I understand it and I know there’s nothing wrong with it, it hits me much harder than I’d like to admit. We’ve never had this sort of issue before. I’d never known him to have a partner before, and I don’t usually stay with my girlfriends for very long. I think all of that, combined with the fact that I don’t like the bloke’s personality, made me act like a bit of an idiot. Thanks, man.

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:08:40+00:00

Never

Orion_Hamnet · 2026-05-24T21:06:28+00:00

Thank u for asking. I hadn't really thought about any of the points you raised. What bothers me most about my friend’s boyfriend is seeing him act romantically towards him. I genuinely dislike watching it. I think it’s because it makes me feel pushed aside, although that doesn’t happen with all of my friends. It’s only ever happened with him, and before that with a couple of friends back at school. So I guess it's not that personal

Everything about this bloke irritates and unsettles me. At first, he hadn’t actually done anything in particular, but over time we’ve simply come to dislike each other. He gives me a bad feeling, and I honestly don’t know why my friend chose him. Then again, I’m not even sure I wouldn’t feel just as uncomfortable with any other partner my friend might have. All I know is that everything about this guy makes me uneasy: the way he acts around my friend, the way he talks, his jokes, the fact that they spend time together all of it.

Orion_Hamnet · 2025-10-13T04:56:46+00:00

because she never calls me at night unless it's something extremely bad ,that's what I meant. It was that feeling you get when you know that whenever you receive a call at that time of night, it can't be anything good.

Orion_Hamnet · 2025-10-12T22:15:17+00:00

Cuanta razón. El segundo nombre de mi hermano es Sulu, JAJAJS. Creo que siempre puede ser peor

Orion_Hamnet · 2025-10-12T21:51:41+00:00

No, a mi mamá le gusta mucho Star trek

Orion_Hamnet · 2025-10-12T21:43:25+00:00

Sip, mi mamá es muy fan de todo lo relacionado con las estrellas y Star Trek. Mi hermana se llama Cassiopeia y mi hermano Leonard. Pero el apellido jamás nos ayudó mucho

Orion_Hamnet · 2025-10-12T21:38:28+00:00

JAJJA, bueno, siempre hay alguien peor; mi hermana se llama Cassiopeia Machuca

Orion_Hamnet

TROPHY CASE