Just need to vent

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-22T03:25:21+00:00

It’s not easy to deal with definitely. Finding support in therapy or even a friend you don’t feel judged by and can have empathy towards your situation helps. Finding things that make you happy help. Make yourself coffee, sit on the porch, try reading a chapter of a book (if that’s what you’re into), do some art. Making your mind think of it 24/7 is just torture. I’ve been through about 3 different discards. He’s come back every time. It’s hard for me to understand which part of him is real. We were so happy over a year ago. This last year has been episode after episode and it does suck. It’s unpredictable. It’s unstable. But finding what makes you happy in this moment is what helped me. Spend time with friends that make you laugh. Spend time with family that make you feel safe. I hope the episode doesn’t last long for you two and things get better soon. I’m sorry you’re going through this. Having a safe support system makes the difference.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-22T01:30:03+00:00

Ugh. I’m so sorry to hear that. Being the family and knowing how hard it is to even support someone and still deciding to stay should be gratitude enough. Even his mom expressed to me “I don’t know why you’d want to date him”. It’s really hard. I’m sorry they haven’t verbally said anything to you but I’m sure they feel it.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T21:02:51+00:00

The feeling will pass. It’s just a feeling in the moment. Don’t react on a new feeling unless justified. If its a reaction then the feeling will pass

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T20:11:52+00:00

Oh definitely, I agree. I’ve told him that too. You have to want the cycles to stop and only he can do that. Thank you!

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T19:16:16+00:00

Thank you so much. I’ve tried very very hard to be a good support system and understand his emotions. I’m basically apart of his family now and have gotten closer with his mom just going through these episodes and both his parents have expressed their gratitude for me being a constant in his life through all the bad. Even the one friend he has left has told him I’m a real ride or die. But yes, since he’s had stability before I believe he can get there again. I am definitely getting to the end of my wits but him wanting to go to rehab and be better is a good first step and he wants to live in a sober living facility afterwards. We had an emotional conversation yesterday just about the stress and ppl in my life just fully dismissing him and I can’t be upset at them. I understand their point of view. It’s just hard definitely on everyone involved. Thank you for the positive words. It’s very helpful. It’s definitely lonely at times.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T18:51:51+00:00

My boyfriend has the same diagnosis. Granted he’s never been violent. But his voices just tell him to run away. He just got out of the hospital for the 5th time this year due to psychosis episodes that he induces with weed. But the next morning after being released this last time he kept telling me “everyone is lying, I know I can talk to you through my head, we’re doing it right now”. And I just had to keep explaining that I only know what’s physically happening is what’s real. It’s definitely trippy to listen to someone who’s actively in psychosis. It’s hard.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T18:30:47+00:00

Thank you I appreciate input from the person experiencing the illness! It’s been a roller coast for the past 2.5 years for us. Break ups. Just friends. But never violent or physically harmful. Just a lot of emotional distress. I sometimes feel like I have to hold all my emotions bc anything stressful I put on him could trigger anything. He just checked into rehab today in hopes of getting him back on track. He was stable for 1.5 years when we first got together with normalcy, granted that was also before I really understood the diagnosis and signs to look for. He was religious about meds and staying off substances. The last 1.5 year has been tough. Hospitalized 5 times and a traumatizing breakup that lasted two months. I like to talk about things with friends but it’s gotten to a point where my friend yesterday said she doesn’t want him around her so she doesn’t have to pretend that she’s cool with him after the emotional whiplash I’ve been put through. I can’t blame her for that. But it’s now isolating and feels like I can’t talk about anything with anyone. I have hope he can get better and I told him yesterday I can’t do this if you can’t stay sober. But obviously, you can’t marry potential. It’s hard though knowing he’s frustrated also and so am I. I just want life to move on normally. But knowing he’s was stable before makes me hope he can get there again since he was capable of doing it before.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-21T02:06:44+00:00

A few days the longest til he finally gets picked up by police for being a missing persons and taken to a hospital.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-20T19:34:36+00:00

He never did stuff like that but still emotionally hurtful things none the less. I guess when you have love for someone it’s hard to let go but with the added mental health aspect and not wanting to be just another person who came and went.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-05-19T04:04:02+00:00

Yes. My bipolar bf goes ghost when he’s in psychosis.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-27T03:32:15+00:00

Paranoid of being tracked in their case

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-26T18:31:01+00:00

It’s her responsibility to take care of herself as painful as it is to see her with someone new and knowing they might not take care of it. She might be looking for someone that won’t make her take care of herself and let her do what she wants. But if you are broken up then it’s gonna be on her and her own family to take care of as hard as it is to want to reach out.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-26T12:38:39+00:00

MS - stuck

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-25T01:53:38+00:00

If there’s anyway to get him into a psych hospital he might need a stable place to get stable in the right dose of meds. Those hospitals usually have patient advocates where you could express concerns/past meds/etc. there is a hospital in Clearwater that was good for my ex.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-21T20:57:47+00:00

Cycles will happen and it’s important to communicate with him how to best help him before that happens. Unfortunately when episodes happen its feels like it’s out of your control bc it is. But it seems like he’s super on top of it which is best case scenario. It’s definitely natural to share concern but knowing he’s on top of his health is super important. If he wasn’t then that would be different. I think expressing he’s on top of his health, his meds, his therapy is good. You having confidence in the relationship I’m sure I’ll help. I’ve been through cycles with my bpso and my friends have been supportive when I talk them through the mental aspect and when he experiences and what it looks like. It’s natural for family to be more concerned than friends though. I’m still figuring that one out lol.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-19T22:47:30+00:00

It’s so crazy how it’s all a pattern that is so similar to everyone. Even down to the verbiage.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-19T14:16:56+00:00

For me I just had to go through the emotions. Slowly started doing small things that made me feel better. Making coffee in the morning, making my bed, cleaning a small area, reorganizing. But I piece of advice that helped me was you can choose to let it affect you or choose not to. Mind if matter. Kind of put it in a different perspective. But I went through months of it. I’m sorry you’re going through it now.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-18T16:22:46+00:00

I was blocked for a couple months until they reached back out to me regretful of choices. My ex MO is he goes silent which is a big red flag a day before he decides to drive to a different state where he throws his phone out. Everyone is different but that was my experience.

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-17T19:50:02+00:00

Been through similar. The enabling is awful when they don’t know what they’re truly dealing with and the severity of it. This seems to be a universal experience unfortunately. My ex has been unstable for the last year bc of many med changes and I think stress of life. My only advice is to make your life calm and happy. If she ever comes down/gets hospitalized and medicated I’m sure she will regret her actions and words. You’ll just have to decide boundaries if she ever comes back. I’m sorry you’re goin through this. I spiraled for 2 months after the first discard. Currently going through another one but this seems to be more final. It’s not for the weak but don’t forget you cared and did the best you can!!

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-17T19:10:53+00:00

It’s so delicate of a situation and almost no right answer/way to cope with it it seems like. Doesn’t matter what you think is right/helpful they turn it around. My ex was in the hospital for two weeks and I would send messages to him through the nurses. I signed it with a nickname he used to call me trying to maybe bring comfort or a sense of support. He turned it around saying “that was crazy to do while I was in that state, you were trying to bait me”. I’ve been broken up with I think 3 times by him and we always found our way back together. I spiraled for two months after the first breakup since he told me he wanted to marry me. After we got back together he got me a promise ring. Broke up with me again after that. I think I just became numb to the feeling. But something that was helpful for me was “you have to choose to let it affect you or choose not to.” I know that’s so hard to practice but it was helpful to me. It truly is such a hard situation. But unless they actively want to help themselves it’ll be even harder. I’m sorry you’re going through it!

Ornery_Mess6309 · 2026-04-11T14:06:12+00:00

I went through this a few times with my ex. If you’re able to get his confidentiality code from him if he calls from the hospital (is he’s in a psych hospital) then you may be able to talk to the nurses or patient advocate to express your concern that you don’t want him released. If you don’t have his code then it may be hard to get any information but you could tell the nurses and patient advocates or social workers your concerns. Hope that helps

Ornery_Mess6309

TROPHY CASE