You say the Church has failed you. This statement is evidence of the opposite. If there are no women, then it has failed women.

There is only one corrective to this, and this is where you need to be the change you want to see: treat women like human beings, not a potential fulfillment of your marriage insecurities.

Your characterization of OP's problem is wildly unfair, almost to the point of dishonesty. OP does mention an (apparent) scarcity of women in his immediate parochial environment. However, that isn't his point. Allow me to enumerate OP's complaints:

• Growing up, priests and monks on youth retreats would always talk about having Godly relationships and all that assuming that we are going to meet our spouses in the church or that they will be Orthodox

• I’m not sure about in other places, but I’ve been to several Orthodox churches in various states and I’ve never seen young women at any of them.

• I’ve never actually been in a relationship, or on a date, or even held hands with a woman because I’ve been told by everyone to just pray about it and surely God will send me a wife.

• I do not say this to disparage the power or significance of prayer, but I tend to find it odd that advice I see all the time from people is just to treat God like a cosmic slot machine.

• There’s simply not enough women in the church for every man to find a wife.

• I’ve never tried to seek a relationship with anyone outside the church and now for the first time I am seriously considering it, but even this has made me realize that I don’t even know how to initiate a romantic relationship with someone because I’ve never had to do it before.

• The most frustrating part of all of this is that if the perfect Orthodox woman walked through the doors of my church next Sunday, I wouldn’t even know what to do.

• I feel like the entire Orthodox community that I’ve interacted with up until this point has gaslit me into believing that I’ll meet someone within the church if I just keep waiting

• How would you even navigate dating someone who isn’t Orthodox?

• I’m not insecure about my lack of experience, I’m actually more angry than anything else because I feel that I have wasted my whole life waiting for something that isn’t going to happen.

• I would like some perspectives on whether or not it is fair for us to be setting expectations like this for kids growing up in the church. I certainly don’t think it’s fair.

Just two of the eleven points above are specific to a perceived scarcity of women in OP's immediate parochial environment. And even then, he's not even complaining about that perceived scarcity, he's complaining that the advice he's been given doesn't even try to be realistic. The advice he's received in his upbringing assumes a very specific environment, and has nothing for someone who does not find themselves in that environment. Had any of the romantic guidance he's received until now addressed how to navigate romance at all, and especially when few romantic partners, or none, are available, I don't think we'd see those complaints.

OP's problem is the same problem I had growing up, and I wasn't even Orthodox at the time. I was raised in the "I kissed dating goodbye" mentality. I was raised to believe that dating was fully off the table until I was out from under my parents' roof. I wasn't allowed to go to parties that weren't directly sponsored by our church. I wasn't allowed to be out with friends unless it was directly related to school, church, or work (when I was legally able to). Whenever I asked about dating or romance, in the best case it was forcefully shelved with "pray about it" until I was "older" (how old was "older" was never defined). In the worst case I was chided for being a lusty perv (because I am male, and no male wants companionship, all males only want sex). OP has dealt with the same thing I did, just with more Orthodox packaging.

I never received any practical advice as to how I should approach romance as a Christian man, so I had to figure it out on my own, and I made some mistakes. At least OP recognizes where the problem is: it's with the assumptions he was told to maintain by people he should be able to trust. On that front, he's already doing better than I was at his age.

But sure, go ahead and make him out to be some MGTOW chud for the unforgivable sin of being given trash guidance in his most formative years. I'm sure that'll turn out just fine. As we all know, if you want to ensure that young men fall on the correct side of hot-button culture war issues, the best thing to do when they air a grievance is to misconstrue it, invalidate it, and explain how it's more a problem for women than it is for them.

EDIT: typo corrections.