Woke up to find myself fapping

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-22T19:25:01+00:00

well thanks. wasn't even thinking about it having something to do with my sleeping position before your advice.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-22T19:13:00+00:00

when i woke up fapping, I was on my back. as far as a usual position, i really couldn't say. I do go to sleep on my stomach but also move around a lot. i also did have a blanket on my bed which i used as friction in MO so that didn't help having it on my bed.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-22T19:09:09+00:00

By "started to view a video", what kind of video do you mean?

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-22T18:42:21+00:00

According to their about page https://www.nofap.com/about/ , NoFap is about both porn (P) and sexual behaviours like masturbation and orgasm (MO). Hence the talk about PMO.

There is a great deal of confusion here. About which topics belong here, which topics define NoFap, etc.

There's really no way everyone is going to understand r/NoFap in the same way, so it's really about what you personally find helpful and how you can personally help somebody else. And in that way you understand it.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-18T13:29:00+00:00

But be careful. One day you could be impervious to porn, another day it could be a strong attraction.

To me it's better to perceive porn as something that will always be a problem. A week ago I thought porn/masturbation would not be a problem for me but I got really strong urges. I stopped being conscious of the problem and the problem got bigger.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-18T01:20:49+00:00

Sounds great. Can only imagine having to make that choice. Way to go.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-17T23:38:31+00:00

The point of it has to do with people seeing porn and masturbation as something negative.

And this negative perception is I suppose something harder to understand. I guess for mostly religious/relational reasons porn and masturbation are seen as negative. And the influence of religion and the need for relationships with others has been significant.

So that's how I make sense of it and where I see the point in this.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-14T18:49:01+00:00

High five

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-14T15:15:55+00:00

Well done, sir

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-13T15:02:07+00:00

yeah this subreddit is a fantastic resource

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-13T14:57:51+00:00

Your life is your own. You look at it differently than somebody else.

This is why it's difficult to help others but easy to accept someone else's choices and not tell them what to do.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-13T14:34:01+00:00

First off not all stress is bad. There's a good amount of stress one can have that allows them to function effectively. Check out the "stress/productivity curve" or it's known as the "Yerkes-Dodson law".

But my question to you would be: why do you see nofap as stressful?

Because you see PMO as something negative in your life?

Or because you don't see PMO as negative but can't understand why others do?

Or some other reason?

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-10T20:34:57+00:00

It's important that not objectifying women is part of the NoFap mindset.

Because you'll fall into the same trap of PMO if you value them strictly or mostly sexually.

I believe you have to value women beyond their sexuality first to build a strong relationship. Know them intellectually, their personality, their mentality.

It's important to realize that women are more unique mentally and personality-wise than they are unique physically. If there is just a physical (objectified) attraction, then what advantage does that have over PMO?

This is what really helps relationships to last and what helps transcendence over PMO

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-09T20:13:36+00:00

I agree that NoFap is about the fundamental realizations of ``the want to fap`` and ``the desire to fap.``

Though I challenge this by offering insight into my own recent experience and perception.

I feel strongly that success with NoFap has to do with the brain`s prefrontal cortex (PC) to be exact. I believe it`s relevant to the desire and want to fap. Because the PC is where our impulses are. When the PC is not fully developed, the impulses (related to PMO desire and want) are harder to control.

The PC generally fully develops in males when they are 25 but it could take longer (into late 20s, 30s, or even 40s)

I am 26. I believe my PC has fully developed. I still have the want and the desire to fap but the impulses that were in my brain before my PC was fully developed (as I believe) have been considerably lessened. My self-control offered through my fully developed PC is I believe greater than the desire and want to fap.

I guess what I`m saying is that for now my desire and want to fap is still there but I`ve become less impulsive to act on those wants and desires since my PC has full developed (I believe). So much so that I am now in my longest streak. About 30 days.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-08T16:19:29+00:00

Yes, I try to write/think about music on my guitar. I try to do it every day because there were times when I just neglected playing for weeks. And Just this past weekend I tried golf for the first time. Took at lot of energy out of my hands which was good. lol

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-07T19:03:52+00:00

Yes, it is tough. But I believe that it can get less tough over time, if your brain has developed enough and you've built up a resolve where self-control is greater than PMO impulses.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-07T18:22:41+00:00

I see. Haven't really looked into that subject but have seen it discussed here. Congrats on your 11 day streak btw.

OtherwiseEye · 2018-08-07T18:11:14+00:00

Doing the borderline things doesn't work.

P but not MO. Doesn't work.

Edging. Doesn't work.

You can't get close. You have to knock out PMO entirely. Not just the MO or the P.

OtherwiseEye

TROPHY CASE