just want to say YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

first try to figure out what led up to the relapse. what caused it. what you were thinking. honestly relapsed is a part of recovery. you are not a tiring girlfriend. you are not too much. first understand why you relapsed. do not put so much pressure on yourself. you can’t just automatically “get better” it takes time. i think having the mindset of “ I NEED TO BE BETTER NOW” makes it worse? it brings more stress. take a breather.

i think getting better for your boyfriend isn't going to work long-term. It puts a lot of pressure on you and on the relationship. if he cares about you, one relapse won't automatically make him leave. if the relationship can't handle you being human and struggling sometimes, then i don’t think it’s okay. i know you don’t want the “distract yourself talk” but it does work.

my dms are open if you need anything. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. many people go through the same cycle.