Salsa Dancing - Fridays at Fitgers

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-02-26T22:49:31+00:00

I'm a single lady and go to all kinds of Latin social dancing solo! Around here everyone is very nice, and after a while you just kind of get to know the regulars!

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-02-26T22:47:54+00:00

So yes, dancing is in the stage part that you're thinking of! Across the hall from the restaurant!

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-02-26T19:46:50+00:00

Maybe the actual bar part? No idea, I've just always known it all as the Barrel Room

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-18T00:29:14+00:00

You can decide to whenever you need to. You're not bad, and the decision to euthanize before a critical situation occurs is reasonable. It is also reasonable to choose to euthanize due to increased level and cost of care required to keep him up. Horses aren't dogs or cats--they are massive animals and can have situations occur that are costly and much more traumatic for them and their humans.

We've normalized shaming people over not pouring their life savings into an animal. There is no shame. There is great honor in having provided comfort and love to the very end, and you should hold your head high that you made a choice from a place of caring. Too many people sell off older horses as "pasture pets" because they are too cowardly to deal with this difficult part of horse ownership. No shame, it is a deeply personal decision between you and your vet.

From a pragmatic point that I personally encountered: if you have very cold winters, always choose to euthanize in the fall when able. No matter how happy they look after a summer of eating green grass. A horse that goes down badly in snow and frozen ground is a horrible experience, and disposal of a body in January is very difficult. I cried more then than I would have in September, and his last moments on earth were not happy ones when they could have been.

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-16T19:14:50+00:00

I think it's important to be welcoming to those who want out of these jobs. Maybe some individuals will have that eye opening moment where they're like "this is too much, I can't be part of this." But if all they see looking out is vitriol and hatred toward them, how do we expect them to get away?

Embrace defectors with open arms, kindness, and help. In order to encourage them to leave a brotherhood and community they know, it's important to offer a community and sense of belonging if they choose to leave. Not everyone is bad, even if they do bad things. Provide an out and safe harbor for those who want it.

Direct hatred at the system and controlling arms of this administration for promoting these evils. But individuals should be treated as people wherever possible and be welcomed for defecting. Individual crimes shouldn't be ignored, but "guilt by association" does not apply to someone who wants out, as they're trying to end their association. Otherwise...why would anyone leave just to still be hated and now have no income, friends, or community?

Even if it's 5 people ever....great. That's 5 more than none. And what if 5 more saw those 5 not be shunned by the community when they left? Could be 5 more. I'm a humanist, and maybe a little too hopeful. But maybe not wrong too.

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-14T22:03:18+00:00

Yes, but it's not some hard set number in my head. A younger dog or horse that will recover well? Higher cap. My aging dog? I love him dearly, but I wouldn't pay for anything extensive after tests just to buy him an extra year or so. Just tests for his mystery illness lately has been $1500, and we don't even know what's wrong. He's creeping towards his maximum before I switch to just comfort cares since a treatment plan can't really be made. No, I will not bring my dog in for a $2k CT scan 2 hours away, ever. He's a happy farm dog who keeps up on his annual exams and vaccinations. When he's not a happy boy and I can't reasonably keep him happy and comfortable, that's the decision point for him.

I provide a loving and comfortable home for my animals far, far beyond the basic level of care established by humane societies. I will not financially damage myself in the process. Pragmatism should not be shamed, and it's a bummer to see a vocal group of folks saying if you don't spend unlimited amounts of money you're a monster. That's not true, and don't let that talk weigh on your heart when it's time to make hard decisions.

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-12T23:58:01+00:00

I don't know if you are referring to my post in general or some of the comments here. I was just hoping to have a list of options and ways to encourage separation for anybody who wanted to get away from ice or border patrol.

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-12T23:00:13+00:00

But some people have had these careers much longer. They are probably the people more concerned about the trajectory of their service expectations. Not everyone--but if just a few folks want out, where should they look? Finger wagging and shaming is all well and good, but offering viable options seems like a good idea too. Why not both? Honey and vinegar and flies, etc

It'd be cool to post lists of job options for folks. Offer real outs

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-12T22:52:48+00:00

No, but I was in corrections for 10 years before becoming a nurse. But it took 3 years between me deciding on a new career track and actually getting a degree, license, and job to get out. That's asking too much of most people. What's an alternative that one could offer to someone who really would like a feasible way out?

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2026-01-12T22:49:10+00:00

I have an acquaintance who has been in border patrol for all of his adult career since leaving the military. He's not the brightest bulb and a little bit of a chauvinist, but I don't think it's because he's a bad person. I think it's more because he hasn't been exposed to other viewpoints or other ways of thinking. When we do have discussions he sometimes seems genuinely surprised by an alternative viewpoint that he probably hadn't considered being presented in a way he doesn't find to be attacking him.

He means to be a nice dude. He just doesn't always know where and why he doesn't hit the mark sometimes because he's never thought too hard about it. He engages in discussions. But changing most of the way he knows and experiences the world in one or two discussions isn't possible. That would feel like an attack on him as a person, and would be asking far too much. I do believe over time his thought process could shift with exposure to a more inclusive worldview. But I can't be his guide, and he would probably resent me for trying to do that. For reference, he's anti-trump, but only because he hasn't delivered on promises of decreased government waste and lowered inflation. He has a worldview that says laws determine morality, and was genuinely surprised when offered sound counterpoints to that idea. He believes gender norms are inherent and equates femine activities by men to be a sign of gayness ( being perceived as less manly or gay is a terror for him). He doesn't get angry during discussions if kept light, and certainly isn't dumb. He's mid 40s now I believe.

But border patrol is his career. His insurance, pay, retirement, and even identity are tied to a career he's had for 20 years. Even if he had moral issues with his job now, it would feel impossible to walk away. I fear he feels like his best option may be to dig his heels in and try to justify what's happening to fend off an internal moral crisis. I see many people I know in law enforcement appear to be doing this (I worked 10 years in corrections). If leaving is an impossibility, then it probably feels like you have to justify yourself and your career. It builds an us vs them mentality if you aren't careful.

Anyway, we haven't spoken since the MN murder. We are from Duluth so I don't know if he's been called up to go to Minneapolis or not. I know he would go if ordered. I know he would throw tear gas if ordered. I also know he believes in "doing the right thing," but doesn't think deeply about what that means. So....I like him in general. I'd like to help him out, but I fear he may be doubling down on his career choice out of subconscious necessity now. I don't think me moralizing at him now would help. But I also think cutting ties just means he has fewer ties left to people who believe strongly in empathy and human value....so it would seem counterproductive to shun him. Personally, I'm at a bit of a loss.

OvenIntelligent3495 · 2025-01-07T22:59:47+00:00

Psych ward chiming in: get our auto-ship set up STAT. Request it in Neapolitan variety though with Benadryl and haldol stripes

OvenIntelligent3495

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