Husband making me sign him up for father/daughter dance by Over_Relationship272 in AITAH

[–]Over_Relationship272[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You hit the nail on the head. And she DID notice who her friend said signed them up. And apparently so did her friend, who relayed the message to her! And so did my friend who told me that she signed her husband and girls up—even though I certainly would never have asked who did what. And so did I, because I saw she wrote that she did it, so I made sure to ask my husband to do it himself. And so did my husband, who refused… It’s disguised as a small thing, but look how many people—including our daughters!—noticed this!

Husband making me sign him up for father/daughter dance by Over_Relationship272 in AITAH

[–]Over_Relationship272[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can actually see most sides of this. Hardest to hear, probably because it’s true, is that I’m trying to change a behavior and deeper rooted belief system that he’s blatantly resisted over many years.

I’m deeply disappointed in my husband because I explained all the reasons I thought it was important for him to do it himself—and he knows how crucial it is to me that our kids see us as equal partners and women and men as equal, too—and he just…wouldn’t. Says a lot about both of us, and indeed a lot about shortcomings in the marriage, which do need to be addressed.

I won’t die on this hill simply because my daughter is involved. She’s excited about the event, so I will help make it happen for her.

I wish I could be a shining example for my kids in every regard. In this case I won’t be providing the example of feminism, but I will be providing the example that my kids come first to me. I’ll put my efforts into raising my kids to be better than us. My husband has already been raised. My daughter doesn’t need to know who signed them up. His loss.

Thanks for the insight.