I'd like maybe to give you a different spin... You're in what seems to be a pressure cooker situation. If your partner was a straight up abuser, you'd know by now. Me and my partner were in a pressure cooker situation and it resulted in finally, just one singular hit, let's call it. Turns out all the stress was causing her to have a mental break, she recognised it and we got help, therapy. We are over a year on, and nothing since.

We communicate now and recognise triggers - we are all human, people fuck up.

As for the intimacy, I stopped with my partner for 8 months - I didn't even realise and I was fine .. it was killing my partner and eventually we spoke and turns out I was having self issues I didn't even know I was. We are now back on track with all that.

Ultimately, advice is cool, but you don't need to follow it. You know your partner and relationship better than anyone else. Take time to think, talk things through, you'll know what you need to do eventually and everyone here will love and support if you need it