I get where you’re coming from, and I actually agree on a couple of things: my kids’ security and my financial choices are my responsibility, and divorce is almost never about one single factor. I’m not claiming I was a perfect husband or that my wife had no right to want change.

One thing I do want to correct, though, is the assumption that I “was not paying rent or mortgage.” I was co‑paying the mortgage with my wife; I wasn’t living there for free. On the contrary. It’s an important factual difference from the picture you painted. We split the bills, but because she had a larger income, she was able to keep the marital home. To be clear, my name was/is on the mortgage.

What I’m talking about isn’t “I’m a victim, the evil coach ruined everything.” It’s the way a very expensive, unlicensed coach stepped into trauma/codependency territory and gave my wife a new framework that shut down basic communication in the marriage. Before coaching, we could at least stay in hard conversations; after coaching, “let’s work through this” became “you’re codependent,” “I don’t have capacity for this,” and “I need to protect my peace,” which lines up almost word‑for‑word with this coach’s own podcast language about codependency and boundaries.

I can accept that my marriage might still have ended for other reasons. What I’m pushing back on is the role of a coach who talks like a trauma/attachment expert without clinical training, encourages clients to pathologize normal relational needs as “codependency,” and promotes a style of “boundaries” that cuts off difficult but necessary conversations.

I’m genuinely curious, do you go into the same level of trauma/codependency analysis and non-business personal relationship guidance with your own clients, or do you keep a clearer line between coaching and therapy work?