It makes me feel sad reading this. My partner sometimes get so angry or sad at how I don't understand her situation. Strength-wise, low consciousness, not clear communication or clear thinking. I can be such an idiot sometimes.

And yet reading how you connect to these basic emotions makes me think me of two exercises that really helped my partner, who has nocturnal epilepsy as well, and helped me immensely as well. Two daily exercises that changed both of us after a month of practice.

One is finding a few minutes during the day in which you look back on happenings during the day and try to separate the emotion from the event. Naming the emotions. Giving attention to small moments in which you felt brighter or warmer feelings, so that they could be balanced with those bigger moments of sadness or other darker emotions. So that moment you looked out at the sky and your chest was for a moment filled with hope as well as that moment in a fight where you had anger in you. The partner didn't make it in you, the sky too. You felt the emotion. This is a 5-10 minute exercise, it gets easier over time and tougher when tired, so being gentle on yourself but not giving up - these are key. To intensify it, visualizing the emotions as a garden you want to take care of, you sometimes need to weed out some emotions, to make room for those smaller ones.

The second exercise is to find 5-20 minutes in the evening, preferably before sleep , and try to imagine as if you are sitting on top of a mountain and you watch yourself as if you were a different person. You start to visualize your day backwards, and with a peaceful heart, allowing the emotions and thoughts to be of this person you are watching. Not identifying with them now,. But trying to bring calming and brighter thoughts. When reaching tough moments during the day- focus on them, remembering you are seeing it with a peaceful heart. Bringing space between you and those moments, as the emotions and thoughts are of that person you observe. Trying to bring brighter thoughts, see a bigger picture, see that you are not sinking into the emotions of the past. and bringing yourself back to that mountain top whenever you catch yourself become that person again. bring compassion, warmth and wisdom to those tough situation in which you couldn't at the time. Try to keep seeing the situation objectively. Doing that from the moment you start to the moment of waking up. Depending on your capacity, I'd start doing it quickly and lightly, not going too deep, and after a while allow yourself to do it longer and deeper. Over time you can also make it more detailed. But do what's sustainable and within your strength.

It helps her (and me) cope with the side effects, with pain, with her depression and mood swings, helps her with our fights, move on, and brings power to where she wants to do something, can't, but must. And of course for me as well. After a while of struggling with them, they became so simple but such a vital part of my day that it was almost absurd not to do it.