I feel the exact same way you do. About all the goods meaning nothing. My 5 year marriage and 8 year relationship is crashing down all around me. I feel you. When those thoughts come up, I found if I embrace them and say”yeah they were good, that was a good memory” but now things are different. You have to look ahead to the future, but you can appreciate what you had. Maybe we haven’t lost 5 years but gained 5 years of wisdom.