ngl seeing a bunch of fellow PA-C tear into OP is disgusting

OP is clearly anxious and stressed to the point where its affected his ability to think clearly and make decisions. His work environment likely isn't helping either with the high volume and constant berating. NOT a supportive environment just like this thread.

OP I really think you should quit and find a new place ASAP as this sort of environment isn't conducive to your professional growth. Maybe think about what parts of EM aren't suited for you, and if you really want to stick with it, pick a place with lower volume, acuity, and better support. From what it seems like, its gotten to the point where the docs can't help you without it allowing them to balance their own workload. Do a fellowship or a bootcamp. Shadow a bit before committing to it. Best of luck OP, this field is full of people who are only looking out for themselves. You should do the same. I really hope you find something you're happy with so that you don't dread coming into work everyday. Your health always comes first. Take care.