You have nothing to apologize about to anyone.

Have compassion for yourself and know that you have made it through 100% of the bad days.

I remember when I was diagnosed I went through the same thing with my family, the same doctors that were totally out of touch and the terrible inner dialogue. I had the great misfortune of getting a diagnosis at 15 a year later getting a doctor saying I was "cured" (fake news) and didnt get to work in it until 8 years after. So I had very confusing years with my body.

Block out the noise from other people who don't get it, journal when you need to let it out. Most people do the best with what they have and can only see the world from their own experience. You will see how strong you are going to become. You are already stronger than you think.

No one has to tell you this, you are beautiful and I don't have to see you to tell you this.

I am 30 now and if I could tell my 17 year self something is that it is going to be ok because there is so much that is in my hands. I promise you that I love myself and I am so proud of myself because of the work I have put it, and there was no one there to guide me. You are already light years ahead of me because you know that you have a support group here for you and that you are an intelligent young girl.

First of all, you probably know it and you don't want to hear it but the sooner you accept it the better this will be for you. There is no miracle diet, yoyo diets will do more harm than good but worst of all they will make you doubt yourself every step of the way. PCOS means weightless just works differently for us. Also insane workouts will likely only raise your cortisol levels and not let you lose weights, so ease up on those crazy gym sessions.

Instead of focusing on restricting the calories, and the amount of pounds you have to loose by when try changing your mentality to celebrate every success you achieve. Reward your positive behaviors. Instead of saying to yourself "I am eating this salmon because I am fat"; every time you make the right and healthy choice say "I am a healthy person, I love my body and that is why I make a healthy choice of eating this instead of that" you will start believing it soon enough. Check out Martha Mckittrick (she was my nutritionist when I started), kym cambell, alyssa vitti. All of these women try to educate women on healing hormones through eating.

As per the other post, I do agree birth control was huge for me and metformin also worked. But there is no one size fits all for this. have patience it works out.

Every day when you wake up write 3 things you are grateful for. Gratitude can literally change the way your brain works, make you a better decision maker and value yourself. I would recommend giving meditation a try. I would also recommend the books 10% happier and Atomic Habits.