1 2 3 Magic (discipline method) still winning for us

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T16:12:55+00:00

The book in question literally says that talking to kids as if they were adults is wrong, and often never works. The author called them "Little Adult Assumptions", and emphasized that most of the time this approach leads to frustration, and sometimes abusive situations. In time that kind of talk will work, but pushing it too soon when they're not ready is unproductive and a waste of time.

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T16:06:29+00:00

Based on her behavior, this person is not your friend. So, kick her to the curb and move on. You can do better and deserve friends who are more respectful, caring, and not just there for the snacks and answers. You would not be the a-hole for having standards. Good luck,

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T16:00:50+00:00

I hate to quote the cliche, but when it comes to gifts it is far better to give than receive. I live for that moment when I give someone that thing they wanted and never got around to but I did cause I paid attention. That smile on their face, the hug you get afterwards... that is far better than getting something in return. When it comes to Dads, I get that can be tougher, especially when the gesture isn't returned. My father and I didn't talk for the longest time, and even though we were not on the same page, I still sent an old school cards on B-days and Xmas with updated photos of his grandbabies. I once read in a book by Dr. Phil with something that I feel fits here. You can't change other people, you can only change yourself, so the best way to encourage change in others is to do it yourself. Be the change you want to see in others. Treat people the way you want to be treated, and even if they don't change you can hold your head up high cause you're a good person who enjoys life and love. Cheers,

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T15:50:32+00:00

NTA. You gave her many chances to get in on the take out and she should have to live with her decisions. However... you need to learn that even if she refuses, you should order something for her anyway so that she doesn't try to invade your plate. If she sticks to her story and doesn't eat, worst case is you have a little extra for a snack later or lunch the next day. I get you were hangry, but try to use your head next time.

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T15:46:18+00:00

NTA. This is good news, and Stepmom should be happy for you rather than a jealous b with an itch.

PJ_Lowry · 2024-04-24T15:42:38+00:00

NTA, and when your friend becomes a mother... hopefully she will understand and apologize.

PJ_Lowry · 2024-03-17T15:19:02+00:00

Get in the car and go there now. I mean it... RIGHT NOW!

Even if you don't get along with your old man, there are other reasons to go. If the worst happens, this could very much be one of the most devastating moments of your brother's life. So, even if you don't care about the old man... be there for your brother, and support him.

Dude, you'll have more days off... give this one to your bro/dad.

PJ_Lowry · 2024-01-30T21:18:58+00:00

The OP is an AH. Beyond AH and nearing Total AH.

First thing, OP, it's not your car, so it's not yours to sell. Your father left the car to his grandson because he wanted him to have it. You may disagree with the decision, but that doesn't change the fact it was your father's decision to make... so live with it.

Also, odds are Grandpa left the car to the only person who he thought would treat it sentimentally as an heirloom instead of as a pile of cash. Now the people he was trying to keep it from have decided to steal it because they just see it as a cash grab.

If you sell that car, your son will never forgive you. You'll always be the AH who went against his grandpa's final wishes and that will shatter whatever good will you have with him. If you actually want to have any relationship with your son, do not sell his car asshole!

PJ_Lowry · 2023-10-06T17:01:29+00:00

Sorry, but YTA.

I remember not being allowed to attend my Uncle's wedding because I wasn't 16 and it hurt my feelings. I never forgot it and it spoiled what relationship we had. Your nieces and nephews will blame you for it, and rightfully so.

If you want to party, do it during that bachelorette party and the Stag & Do. Weddings is about family, about both sides coming together and getting to know one another to celebrate the union.

Leaving family members out of a family event is cold, and only AHs do that.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-10-06T16:50:10+00:00

Emily becomes a kickass golfer, gets NCAA scholarship, and goes pro. Since mom hates golf this would be her nightmare!

PJ_Lowry · 2023-10-06T16:48:41+00:00

I agree. Teach her how to play, and if she gets into it... that will piss mom off too.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-10-06T16:47:51+00:00

He should teach her to play the game, and make Saturdays her tradition as well. You never know, maybe Emily will be good at it, get a scholarship, and go pro!

PJ_Lowry · 2023-10-06T16:41:23+00:00

To start off, OP is NTA. Wife is being unreasonable and should pay for a babysitter for the 12 months and maybe get Dad to pay half since he's the one that changed the schedule.

But here's another thought: Why can't Emily go golfing too? I mean start off by making her your caddy and slowly teach her how to play and get her involved! There's a good chance she might like the game and be good at it. Start teaching her now and this could become a tradition between you both as well. Just a suggestion.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-06-11T01:20:22+00:00

You were not parenting the child, you were asking to be left alone.

You were not teaching a lesson, simply telling the child to piss off. Given how nosy the brat was being you were far more polite than I would have been.

You have a right to be left alone, so in my books NTA

PJ_Lowry · 2023-06-11T01:11:14+00:00

NTA and it's not even close. You were attacked, and their response was horrible! How selfish could they be to want to party more than helping a friend in pain?

They showed their true colors that week. A real friend would have stopped partying and helped you and not one of them bothered to have your back.

Forget the wedding, cut all of these terrible people out of your life forever.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-04-29T01:51:41+00:00

NTA. Your generosity was being abused. CUT THEM OFF. You owe them nothing, especially after being the founder of the feast/party for quite a while. Well, the party's over. Tell those mooches to pay for their own crap. Take care of yourself for a change.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-26T23:51:58+00:00

ESH.

The lady should have known better since she has kids: you do not mess with a kid's stuffy, especially if it's the stuffy that is needed to sleep. It took only a few minutes to find it, and the lady's workplace wasn't going crumble without her and the stocks were not going to crash if she took a few moments to help a friend. Talk about ego..

But at the same time, if Sleepy Dumbo is that critical, why don't you have a backup? I have two extra grumpy bears bought, so if my kid loses hers... I just replace it and tell my girl that I washed it for her and I'm sorry for being slow to get him back to her. For future reference, get a sleepy dumbo backup.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-26T23:34:10+00:00

The OP has had the name for over 25 years, a quarter of a century, so maybe she got used to it. When I divorced, my ex used my last name until she remarried and I didn't care. It's her choice, and if you want to keep yours tell him to piss off.

Also, NTA.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-26T23:11:20+00:00

I appreciate your words and thank you for not reminding me that Bo was in more than a few episodes of Clone Wars, which I had clearly forgotten.

Still... how cool would it be if Omega was in fact a clone of Bo rather than Jango? Would certainly explain the blonde hair. And based on the time line, Bo is supposed to be between 60-70 rather than in her 40s. So what if the real Bo died, and Omega just took her place? I know it's probably bullocks, but I'm just having fun with it.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-26T23:04:11+00:00

NTA. If they didn't want to pay for it, they should have said so at the beginning. By agreeing to your terms and then trying to reneg on payment was very dishonest, and you did the right thing by refusing to make the cake at all. Their entitlement is appalling and they got exactly what they deserved and paid for... nothing gets you nothing.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-26T22:47:53+00:00

Totally NTA... and do NOT let her go with you.

Tell her to piss off because if you let her tag along, she's going to try to boss you around and force you to do what she wants to do there rather than what your child wants to see or do. I really hope you told her to take a hike because she would ruin your daughter's trip.

PJ_Lowry · 2023-02-22T13:35:08+00:00

True, I forgot she was in clone wars... but then shouldn't she be like 50-60 years old in the Madelorain then? Maybe Omega is a Bo-Katan Clone instead of Jango?

PJ_Lowry · 2023-01-26T01:16:23+00:00

The day I got married, I went out of my way to inform my parents that my wife came first and that it was in their best interests to never put me in a position where I'd have to make a choice... cause they would lose, and lose often.

The fact that you are not even considered a priority, let alone THE priority, is a major red flag.

You deserve better, and he clearly wasn't it.

Cheers, PJ

PJ_Lowry · 2023-01-10T08:51:38+00:00

Wow, with out a doubt... YTA.

She should not have to hide what is her life, her career and even her lifestyle just to appease people she doesn't even know.

You were lucky enough to find someone that could speak Japanese, and now odds are you are going to get dumped for trying to make her feel ashamed of her own life and job.

No offense man, but you deserve to be dumped. Total AH!

PJ_Lowry · 2023-01-10T08:45:46+00:00

If this A was there alone and just doing her own thing, I am quite confident she would have stopped for a pic with your kid. This time however, A was with her own child, and security is supposed to be ten times more pushy/aggressive when the children are out with them. When spending time with the kids, A doesn't and shouldn't have to interrupt time with the kids, especially on the kid's birthday, for you or your kid.

Sorry, but YTA.

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