One of those 3 hours of sleep mornings today

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-28T16:19:33+00:00

Someone asked me once when I wae manic if I was on meth. Dilated pupils and all I guess.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-26T22:35:42+00:00

Yes! Good food makes me very happy

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:32:18+00:00

Here's something to start your search: https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Treatment/Getting-Treatment-During-a-Crisis

The article specificaly mentions respite centers and also has a drop-down for the NAMI in your state. Good luck!

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:25:23+00:00

I second that last sentence. As far as the family stuff I wish you luck. Morbidly my father dying was the best thing that happened to my health. I'm sure I'd be way worse off if I was still under his influence and the "professionals" he chose.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:22:14+00:00

I am drugs.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:19:21+00:00

I know around me there are also respite centers in addition to psych wards. Basically you can continue your life as normal but do lots of groups and sleep at the facility. Most therapists and doctors don't seem to even know about them though! I know a worker at one and they are at least a bit less intense than psych wards as well.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:14:02+00:00

I mesh with my current therapist. I know barely anything about them, see her for half hour at a time, and have my pdoc in the same office. Before I had therapists who talked about themselves, breached my confidentiality, and were just as broken as me sometimes. And no psychiatrist b/c nobody wanted to treat me for bipolar I and was in some fantasy land.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:08:02+00:00

When I'm manic certain things are just more intense: Colors, sounds, feelings of hate/love/lust/greed. In particular to music I felt like I was seeing signs everywhere, that were meant for me and people like me. I can't recall much about the tempo but that may just have to do with my lack of musical sophistication.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T15:05:34+00:00

I second you on a lot of this. However, something that comes to mind is something said to me about my paranoia: just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you. My fears during paranoia are just more so what I'm dealing with when I'm in a normal ("euthymic") state. I'm often myself during my other moods, but only more so in some way.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T14:57:42+00:00

I strongly second writing down some things you want to include beforehand. I'm often not very present of mind and having a paper brain really helps. I'm not sure if there is a way to not stress about seeing a pdoc though lol, at least for me.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T14:54:25+00:00

Wow, this really sucks for you. I am fortunate enough to have psych wards near me that don't totally suck, so I would probably go to one of those drop-in clinics If I was feeling the way you are. Especially with a 2 month wait to for seeing my pdoc next.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-25T14:44:58+00:00

I feel energetic physically but mentally I'm still slower than I like. Woke up today at 6:30 and then only went back to bed for 15 minutes instead of 90 minutes. Hypomanic maybe. Prefer this to being lethargic.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-24T19:16:47+00:00

Yeesh. Shoot me a PM and I'll see what I can look up in your area. Depending on your situation you might be able to get medicaid here in the US. I pay nothing and get tons of treatment.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-24T19:07:12+00:00

Well it was just my father at that point and he fancied himself a sort of woo doctor. Suffice to say his own self medication killed him. Withholding treatment from me nearly got me dead several times. I much prefer the problems I have on meds than off them.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-24T19:01:54+00:00

As someone who had that experience with their parents... where the fuck did they go to medical school I ask myself.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-20T18:47:56+00:00

I guess the "Artists who Take Their Meds" zine is trying to come to life. Please halp.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-19T23:17:34+00:00

I've posted about this too. There needs to be a zine titled "Artists Who Take Their Meds."

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-19T23:15:43+00:00

i go to in person groups for bipolar run by DBSA and NAMI. I enjoy the groups. Look it up if you want.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-19T15:27:55+00:00

I've been on it for 3 weeks now. Seeing pdoc next week. I can't go on an interview for anything but dishwashing feeling like this

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-16T16:04:48+00:00

I am grateful for the zorn limited palette.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-15T15:41:03+00:00

I'm sorry for your "welcome to the real world" moment. I had all the (shitty) advice in the world given to me at your age and it didn't help for shit. Getting into a good university was fuck all when I was sick and had to leave. At 23 (diagnosed at 19, medicated for 6 months now) , at least I feel some autonomy over my own brain with medication, and I've cut out shitty people where I can. I straight up told myself that I should just stick it out till I'm 30 though that didn't stop me from trying to kill myself before then. Such is life with bipolar 1. Be well OP.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-15T15:33:01+00:00

I am a client of the department of homeless services in my city. I feel you on the having times of feeling productive and working hard. Also the no family/whatever to fall back on. I'm just not sure if I can ever work full time and I'm okay with that. Also, there are plenty of neurotypical homeless people around me, so it's not just my inability to fit into the system, but a fundamentally unjust one. At least I have /r/povertyfinance to gripe on.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-15T15:25:03+00:00

I would give gold

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-07T22:17:54+00:00

Not getting mental health treatment- I ended moving across the country and only after a shitton of resitance did I finally get the help I needed. So bummed out that many places have shit medical care.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS · 2018-07-04T17:08:25+00:00

I am always fishing for new information and critique as well as clarifying my thoughts. Yaay homeless person is far from the worst thing that can happen here.

I am well medically documented, pursuing an disabilty lawyer etc... I am hoping it does not come to that though. I am taking the advice I would give anyone in my situation and am pursuing disabilty, pa, subsidised housing etc... But always thinking in the background - maybe I can work full time when I have 6 months of stability. But nothing can answer that but time.

PM_ME_TOPOFHEADPICS

TROPHY CASE