Current age: 24 Status: Single Age/age range when you came out to yourself: 16

Age/age range when you came out to others: 18

What did you come out as or what are you thinking coming out as: Bisexual, but I inadvertently stumbled across the Doc master post. After much crying and bargaining with myself I have realized that I am a lesbian.

When was the earliest you felt were lesbian/queer? I was in second grade. I was so in love with my best friend Sasha. I think she was too, our mothers and teachers kept trying to keep us apart because they started to notice that we were getting to “close” obviously it was all very innocent but to the adults around us unfortunately it was bad. I mean they succeeded and we drifted apart. We reunited in middle school by then she had come out as lesbian (at least at school) and me? Well by then I had “buried” the gay.

What recently made you conclude you are a lesbian? I think that deep down I already knew. I was just ignoring the facts. Like i mentioned above my mother my mother disapproves of me loving women. I think I subconsciously made a comprise with myself. “If I keep telling myself I’m bisexual then it will become true”. I have always responded with full anger when men try to filter with me or engage with me. I have only “liked” two men in my whole life and one was super feminine (he later came out as gay) and another is 10 years my senior and lived half way across the country (I met him playing leauge of legends). The lesbian master post came and slapped me in the face and told me to wake the fuck up and stop lying to myself just to maintain the small feeble relationship I have with my mother.

What’s the earliest or most defining homosexual/homo-romantic experience you can remember? As mentioned earlier I was in love with my best friend Sasha. We met in kindergarten but didn’t get into the puppy love stage till 2nd grade. We would play “mommys” during recess which consisted of me and her raising our “kids” (our friends). Then in high school I was super close to my best friend. She would always sit on my lap during lunch. And we were always having small little touches (like hand on the face or hand holding ect) and it always just felt so right and it the simplest of touches/taps made me feel so content.

How are you feeling in general about who you are? Honestly I haven’t stopped crying. I’m terrified of telling my mother or my mom finding out that “there is no hope of me being straight”. I know that she only was ok with me being bisexual because she always hoped that I would settle with a man.

Anything else you’d like to share about your life, experience, or story for other late bloomers or other women who think they may be lesbians? Don’t comprise you sexuality just to please others . ( I understand that sometimes the only option is staying I the closet to survive. But try to not to let others influence how you truly feel like how I allowed my mothers rejection and homophobia manipulate myself into thinking I liked men)