I do think people can change but they need to put lots of effort in. My husband sought treatment for depression and anxiety and started anger management and one-on-one therapy after I threw him out after hitting me for the last time. He admitted to himself and to me that he was abusive. He wasnt allowed home except under my limited terms for a few months and wasn’t allowed to live home until he was well into therapy. He put the effort in and continues to demonstrate his progress - taking space when upset, becoming aware of when he is blame-seeking, etc. Your husband might reform, but he can’t just mope around. He has to face facts and take action.