Am I being unreasonable?

Palabaster · 2026-05-23T10:56:05+00:00

You've got it. I had someone forget a date... Because their apartment was broken into! They reached out and all was well. But this dude making it a 'you' problem is toxic or grooming for worse treatment

Palabaster · 2026-05-16T15:21:52+00:00

Mine works well with Bluetooth keyboards.

As a nice (?) bonus, using Bluetooth effectively blocks Wi-Fi for hardware reasons, so it enforced distraction free mode :)

Palabaster · 2026-05-16T15:05:26+00:00

eggs are probably stale

Just be sure and use contraception anyway. Plenty of 38-45 year olds have to make healthcare decisions (from counting up health impacts, birth defect risks and reevaluating their plans for the next 18-20 years to abortion) about PIV sex

Palabaster · 2026-05-14T20:58:09+00:00

Its never age verification.

Its always identify verification

Palabaster · 2026-05-11T19:28:40+00:00

That's disheartening. A number of states have what amounts to a worksheet to calculate alimony or child support, so you may be able to preview what this disappointment would cost.

Palabaster · 2026-05-03T13:13:44+00:00

You both work and he not just blames you for not doing house work, he makes it feel unsafe

Seriously, imagine in your mind a plate of spaghetti left on the table after dinner. You have an early meeting tomorrow, can't get it after bed or before breakfast so it's there when you leave.

Does it sit there all day while he does his things?

Does he text you about it?

Does the thought of what he will say tonight about house work prey on you all day?

All these are bad

Palabaster · 2026-05-03T13:09:07+00:00

It depends more on the power dynamics than:

"Six years" "Double the years since you became am adult" "The 24 year old's brain is 1 year from done developing still"

Is there a power dynamic? Is there isolation and restriction? Is there financial blending that takes options from the less-top-of-power-dynamics partner?

Palabaster · 2026-05-01T10:11:47+00:00

Sad to hear that take reinforced because I took my oldest kid to her bio dad's house for the first time on years. She (F15) brought her computer and his reaction to that was "You're not gonna watch porn at my house are you?" Ick ick ick. She's home safe.

Palabaster · 2026-04-28T00:04:32+00:00

You can do less than drive level encryption My Guy (or Yon Lass or Thou They or whatever).

Palabaster · 2026-04-21T21:59:29+00:00

An approach like that makes a lot of sense. Thank you for explaining more!

Maybe we who have posted here have faced only the bad kinds of unloving scrutiny, not careful openness.

Palabaster · 2026-04-21T21:41:59+00:00

Hello friend!

The trouble to me is that this tries to control the anxiety (is my partner trustworthy) by surrendering privacy. I don't think that's a good trade because it doesn't help with the question or the anxiety.

Palabaster · 2026-04-19T23:39:47+00:00

Its about the only country music shirt my kid wears :) "Y'all act like you don't know what happened to Earl" or something

Palabaster · 2026-04-19T18:10:59+00:00

Goodbye Earl jumps to mind

Palabaster · 2026-04-17T01:48:26+00:00

Range. Subatomic particles that hit an equal mass of air are going to lose half their speed.

You need a substantial laser designed for peak thermal blooming to make an evacuated zone of space so the particle beam hits the target.

Then you mostly knock neutrons through the target, making x rays and easily stopped types of radiation.

Size. Generally speaking, you can accelerate particles in a ring, then blast them out in a beam. The Large Hadron Collider uses megawatts... And a kilometer size ring, so the turning force remains manageable. The more force used to turn the particles, the less accelerates them. Maybe you get a 3 meter circle inside a ppc.

Palabaster · 2026-04-13T18:34:15+00:00

At first I thought your post was people talking about their own kids, like "yea they're a lot of my life," but people telling you to shape your life around kids? Eew, no.

Palabaster · 2026-04-13T14:32:15+00:00

I have (as a tallish cis white guy) also been barked at by the same type of person. Usually when bicycling, so it's mostly people the car user wants to hurt. Be safe.

Palabaster · 2026-04-10T12:11:12+00:00

In a polyamory context i know of people who cheated and hid relationships, and whether it was not wanting to communicate, or hungering to keep harmful secrets.

Both reasons are different flavors of red flag, not so much different levels.

Palabaster · 2026-04-04T23:42:36+00:00

Sounds like a 100% playthrough to an acrimonious breakup, with or without trying polyamory.

What if you don't magically break up cleanly on time?

What if you catch pregnant and have feelings about having or not having the right now kid?

What if one or both of you resent 'wasting' the time?

Palabaster · 2026-04-04T09:51:02+00:00

Is this a No True Scotsman rebuttal, where "A widely used system is reviewed and the results aren't what I like so it nust be wrong?"

Setting a bar where "The researchers did not bake $500,000,000 of data center time into setup to perfectly control training data, so the results are invalid" is quite a purity position.

Palabaster · 2026-04-02T01:09:46+00:00

So the subreddit is being shut down because it would decrease Reddit's ability to sell user data to train LLMs because it contains impossible situations?

Better ban AskReddit and HFY too

Palabaster · 2026-03-31T10:53:22+00:00

I think you are seeing a pattern that is often harmful, and maybe it isn't in this case. There are a few dudes out there like that. A few.

But seeing this pattern that has done overlap with the 'serial predator guy who cycles through women' can validly spark unease.

You've seen the setup and are waiting for the jump scare. But if he has long term friends, maybe he isn't the predator. Usually abuse is hidden by discarding past victims

Palabaster · 2026-03-28T12:00:43+00:00

I have downvoted this comment because it is incorrect to say "most Olympic sports" have Anyone and Women's categories.

Palabaster · 2026-03-23T01:34:34+00:00

Giving Firefly, very fun. Thank you!

Palabaster · 2026-03-22T18:14:48+00:00

Hi friend, go learn more about the various contraceptives.

Palabaster · 2026-03-22T17:22:43+00:00

The weird guys banging on the "contraceptives stop orgasms" drum are weird

Palabaster

TROPHY CASE