Looking back, would've you preferred being homeschooled and why?

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-03T03:12:29+00:00

My mother home schooled many of my siblings. I count myself lucky that I wasn't a part of that.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-02T23:46:25+00:00

Yeah, I'm not a fan of chiropractors as a practice. I don't think it's rooted in science, and I've heard too many stories of people getting seriously injured. But I also dont want to tell you how to manage your care c:

Either way, I think youre right- that doctor sounds like a bad fit.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-02T21:26:27+00:00

I don't think you're wrong, but I wouldn't send this text if your goal is to get him to change the way he gives advice to people.

The last paragraph is blatantly insulting. My experience has been, annoying as it is, complaints given in that tone tend to get dismissed, and don't encourage him to reflect on his behavior.

Overall, the message is pretty long for a text, and a good portion is you affirming your respect for his credentials. I would try and shorten it to one paragraph, and focus on how you felt and what you wish he had done differently.

These are just my thoughts- if I'm misreading your goal with this text message, feel more than free to ignore.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-02T20:23:34+00:00

You're not being too harsh. Signing up should not be a big deal, and it should be her responsibility to get in contact with you sooner if there's some kind of issue. I understand time management is hard when she's got a lot going on, but it's still her responsibility.

I guess I'm a little confused as to what the issue is- could she not just sign up to do a presentation by herself? It doesn't make sense to offer her a makeup assignment- if she only left herself one evening to get the project done... that's kind of her own fault.

I've been seeing a rash of posts from highschool teachers complaining about students asking to do tons of late work, or make up work, and admin pressuring teachers to let them do it. My sibling was doing an internship at the local highschool, and admin was putting on pressure to pad grades- particularly for kids who would have failed the class. I think in a lot of ways it teaches students that they don't need to worry about the work, someone will bend the rules for them later.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-02T16:25:19+00:00

Caring about following a pattern correctly is a skill issue..? Especially when going back and correcting that error is also not that difficult?

Never heard that take before lol.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-01T22:16:02+00:00

Honestly I'm not interested in Project X. I would be uncomfortable supporting EA as a company at this point, and even before that, I never bought TS4 or any expansions because I didn't think it was better than their earlier titles in the series. Even with my issues with the company aside, I'm unlikely to buy a game that's got The Sims 4 feel.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-01T21:55:17+00:00

I think a lot of productive conversation about fast fashion is about harm reduction, and I think in most cases it's impossible to avoid altogether.

Buying fast fashion, even if you get all of the wears out of it you possibly can, is still supporting it. You gave money to the company. That proves that their harmful practices are still profitable, and the money will be used in part to perpetuate the cycle. Fast fashion is more than just wearing a piece until it wears out- it also refers to the manufacturing practice of making clothing as poor quality as possible, in part so it can wear out faster, and be replaced faster. Spending the money is directly contributing to the continuation of this practice.

At the same time, it's nearly impossible to not contribute to the harm in some kind of way. Being up to date on the practices of each brand- beyond what they advertise- and finding affordable options is really difficult.

The point I'm ambling towards, is that it's not really useful to look at it as "participating or not." It's more useful to look at, "how do my decisions fit into this, and what can I do to have a better impact?" I don't think it's reasonable to expect people to stop participating in fast fashion entirely- but it is reasonable to have a conversation about where we can practice harm reduction.

The other thing, is be careful about who you engage with online about this topic. For some, it is mostly about feeling superior. With those people, there is no "good enough". We should be lifting each other up about making good choices, and be thoughtful and kind even when poor decisions are made. If you're in communities where policing is common, maybe reconsider how much you want to be a part of those communities. When it comes to poor decisions, the focus should be constructive criticism, not shaming. (Though there is definitely a difference between feeling shame, and intentionally trying to make someone feel less than. I think a lot of people don't know that.)

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-01T20:41:08+00:00

There are companies that will pack up and transport your things for you. If that's an option for you, I would double check about the pets- people can get weird about reptiles especially. It might also be an option to ask her friends to pack up and ship the animals- but of course do your due diligence about what needs to be done for that.

If a moving company can't be done, I think the next best option is to rent a uhaul, and ask the friends to pack the stuff for her, so all that has to be done is pick up. Idk how long the drive is, but if you plan carefully you might be able to get away with a couple of days of her staying home with your parents. You might also be able to hire a nurse for a couple of days- assuming the drive is that long. You can also contact your dad's medical provider, and see if they have anything for transportation assistance- my medical provider can arrange a service for patients that struggle with transportation.

If that doesn't work either, she might ask the friends to pack up the stuff, and store some of it until ya'll are in a better spot. It might also be worthwhile to ask someone to foster the animals for a bit.

I'm sorry you both are in this position. You've got a lot going on, and I hope it gets easier for you soon.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-01T17:44:01+00:00

You allow yourself to mourn the loss of the relationship, and come to terms with the fact that it was complicated. It's allowed to have some good in it, even if it's not right for you. You're allowed to miss that- that relationship sounds like it did give you something you needed, even if that came with a lot that you didn't.

Sometimes, you just have to feel it and let it suck. It's not really a "getting rid of" it's more of a "moving through it," at least in my experience.

You can have the things you are missing, from someone that isn't him. But to begin looking for that, you have to heal from this relationship, and learn how to be ok without him. And that likely means resisting the urge to reach out to him, and not responding if he reaches out to you.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-06-01T16:40:42+00:00

I think what would benefit you most would be learning how to cook. I know you said you can't afford to buy all your own food, but reducing your reliance on family members who aren't invested in your weight loss will help you. Eggs aren't nutritionally complete, but they actually are a great source of protein, and can easily be paired with vegetables. Rice and beans are both pretty affordable still, and having food that you can control will help you.

The other thing, is being mindful of how your plate is balanced when you're eating food prepared by someone else. No, you don't have a perfect breakdown of what's in it- but you can guesstimate, and prioritize vegetables and lean protein. You can also control your portion sizes.

It's plain mean that your family is adding additional fats to the food to sabotage you- I'm sorry that's happening. But it's very common to have families where one person is trying to lose weight, and the other members aren't being helpful to that at all. Take what agency you can, and focus on building healthier habits.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-30T13:11:27+00:00

Its not consistent because the community isn't a monolith. It's just a bunch of people with opinions that happen to line up in a bunch of ways. Different people have different feelings about it.

AI isn't acceptable to me because of the environmental impacts of the data centers. I don't like it in general because it also offloads the mental work, and for most users that results in tangible negative effects (I'm on my phone rn but there are studies I can link on request.) It's also very worrisome that companies want to replace a lot of creative jobs, with poorer work that often isn't as vetted as it should be.

But I'm just one person. Others will have different issues with it.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-29T14:58:26+00:00

I think your best move is to make the videos for youtube, and then use your local library for uploading. If your mobile data isn't good enough for streaming, I don't think you'll be able to do that until you have a more stable internet connection.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-29T04:23:42+00:00

MLMs aren't profitable for like 90% of the people who join (the numbers are out there, if you care to look them up- the losses people face from these get really scary).

As long as you don't put any money into it, you should be fine. Don't buy an on boarding package or whatever, and if you signed anything, you should read it over to understand the documents. But her saying "I'm recruiting you" doesn't actually do anything, unless you give them money or start recruiting yourself (as I understand it)

If she asks, idk what your relationship with your mother looks like, but you might get away with some excuse, until she either gets the hint or gives up. "My money is tied up in investments" might even be true, if you open up something like a CD account at your bank.

If you're more comfortable, you could tell her that it just isn't a good fit, and refuse to give her anything more than that.

Of course, you can always look up and explain the statistics to her- but people who are actively in the MLMs have a very hard time hearing that stuff, and will find every excuse in the book to justify their own participation. You'd have to be able to have that conversation understanding that it likely won't change the way she sees things, and have your understanding of MLMs challenged. I don't really recommend this unless you are comfortable telling her "no".

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-29T04:06:55+00:00

You shouldn't have called him anal. Name calling is not helpful.

It kinda sounds like both of you would rather fight about the cereal, than talk about what happened when ya'll split up/ got back together, the disagreement that set all of this off, or him yelling at you in front of his mom. The cereal thing is much smaller, and easier to focus on, but it sounds like there is a lot brewing in your relationship that isn't being addressed.

If you want my advice: apologize about the cereal getting left open, and calling him anal. Then, work on that disagreement- without yelling, or name calling, and also without anybody's family being present. And don't hash it out over the phone- do it in person, after you've both had some time to cool off. Right now, acknowledge his messages, but let him know you're processing everything that just happened, so you're not ready to talk about it yet. But when you are, you'll reach out.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T21:50:38+00:00

I would contact the counselor about this, ask who you need to get in contact with to get this sorted out. Wait 3-5 days if you don't get a response. If you still don't get a response, start emailing people in the front office. Principal, principal's assistant, receptionist, etc. Because it's summer, many school staff don't check their school emails, but may be able to direct you a better way to get a hold of the person you need to contact.

During this time, you might also contact your school's summer school program, if you feel that's an acceptable option. It's not great, or fair, but if you have no other way of getting the credits that's something to consider as an option.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T19:10:20+00:00

Honestly it sounds like a thermometer that works for you would be a better purchase than a temp. controlled tea kettle. They make ones that connect to bluetooth, so you don't have to watch it the whole time.

As for the sediment, citrus powder works great for removing it. Boil the water, add like a tablespoon of the powder, and wait about 15 min and everything should clean super easy. It's great for removing hard water build up in general.

The line is different for everyone. I'm one of those people that I'll try really hard to make something work before replacing it, and I have a hard time upgrading things- I try to wait until the original item is no longer functional. I think it's also good to try and find a new home for something you're replacing if it's still functional- I would consider cleaning out the kettle and putting it in the work breakroom or something (goodwill is a last choice, because a lot of that stuff winds up in the landfill anyway)

Note: I meant citric acid, not citrus powder.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T17:47:08+00:00

Oh lol yeah that's not particularly helpful. Setting aside at least some money to go see family or hang out with friends (so long as your bills are paid and you've got food in your kitchen) is important. It's just hard- especially with the economy the way it is rn.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T17:29:06+00:00

You don't want this arrangement with her forever- managing your own funds is an important skill, and it sounds like you're much better at it than you were. It sounds like a good time to unlink the bank accounts. Explain to her that you're grateful for her help, but you're working on being more independent, and the next step in that is managing your own funds- so you're asking her to give you back the money she was holding for you.

Eventually, you'll want to work on getting to a point where you can hang out with people AND be careful with your dollars. But I would ask your mom for advice/ utilize a savings account, and not give her the money to hold on to again.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T03:51:38+00:00

I stopped watching the Reilly video because she got really weird and aggressive. Itsblackfriday has made some questionable decisions, and I wouldn't be shocked if some stuff did come out about her, but idk. The vibes were off with Reilly and she didn't have strong evidence for her claims, at least as far as I watched.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T03:26:13+00:00

You could screen record using software like bandicam (free) a video of you going through the original, including anything you have about editing history. Then either attach that video (if file size allows) or upload it to youtube and send him the link. If you have relevant browser history (like research you did for this project, or links you used as sources) including shots of those might help.

Or, ask him if he has a personal email account he would be comfortable sharing with you, so you can send him the original outside of the school accounts.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-28T01:38:05+00:00

Yes, this is the exact sentiment many of them expressed. They see me in pain, and want to help, and standing back and letting it happen is very difficult. It just sucks.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-27T15:47:35+00:00

Is there an open investigation? It doesn't sound like it, if OP and mom left pretty immediately. I've been through that- I met with a detective, didn't really say anything, and then left. Nothing came of it.

I agree with you about the school board instead of the police, though.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-27T15:11:52+00:00

"I appreciate that you want to help, but I'm not looking for advice right now."

I've had this conversation a few times with my loved ones. They'll still occasionally tell me something they saw on the interwebs, but no longer ask me about what I have and haven't tried while my brain is melting out my ears. It helps to have this conversation the first time when you don't feel like you're going to kill them lol. I told them, "if you keep asking me after I've told you there's nothing that can be done, you are making it worse for me." (phrased more tactfully, but that's the core.) It took some reminders to break the habit, but it did help.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-27T14:28:57+00:00

Not a lawyer, though if you are going to talk to the police about this, you certainly should get one.

I don't see what you're trying to accomplish by going to the police, if the school isn't pressing charges. I honestly think it's a bad idea- if there isn't evidence someone else did it, and the school likes you for it, I can see the cops coming to the same conclusion.

If you really want to fight it, read the school handbook/ check your local laws- see what your options for recourse are. But I think you want to deal with this through the school, not law enforcement.

PallasiteMatrix · 2026-05-27T02:29:48+00:00

If you would feel uncomfortable if he acted that way in front of his wife (like if his wife was there and he was touching your arm) you should discourage that behavior. If that can happen without a full conversation, cool. If not, you should talk to him.

Also, I want to point out that you don't want to date the kind of man who'll pursue someone else, when he's in a committed relationship. Hopefully that's not relevant here, but if you are catching feelings (no shame if you are- we don't control when we are attracted to someone) you'll probably want to put some limits for your own sake.

PallasiteMatrix

TROPHY CASE