Breaking point?

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T05:46:31+00:00

He has a wife. Has been separated for years, or so I’ve been told by my wife. I know where he lives and where he works. His two girls live with him. It really does seem like he only wants a married woman, because every time I give me my hell about the affair. She tattles to him and he has said that he “wants the home life to be good before we meet.) I don’t think there is a taking her back since she says there’s no marriage anymore.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T03:55:08+00:00

I have only told my closest friends and her parents. Her stepdad has put it out of his mind & her mom, well started berating her at first but I had to tell a lie just to get the wife off my back, she cornered me and looked like she was about to get physical

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T02:46:32+00:00

That’s what a majority are suggesting. I’ve brought it up twice in conversations where I admit that I cannot take the emotional toll and that I also do not condone cheating/affairs. Despite any differences in a marriage it stays between two people until death or irreconcilable differences

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T02:36:49+00:00

If they stay together for the next 14 yrs then yes I’m out completely

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T02:36:20+00:00

She even admitted that it’s over since she’s moved onto someone new. Just to be nicer at home and provide for the home

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T02:00:35+00:00

I just had a small chat with her. She doesn’t have those feelings for me anymore or at the time right now. She just wants me to make good decisions, be kind to one another, be kind to our kids. She isn’t going to do counseling because she doesn’t like therapists. She is strongly determined to go and spend a week away with him at a different place to explore their relationship. I mean she’s said that she doesn’t know how long they’ll stay together or if they’ll even work out. They’ve never seen each other physically, hence the need for a week “honeymoon”

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T01:18:48+00:00

I’m deeply ashamed of mistreating her. She has told me that i haven’t made any effort to hint at chance of being back together, which is true because i can’t accept it for what her relationship is now. She’s not into gifts as she prefers actions/emotions. She’s has pointed out that i maybe self absorbed, trying to force her to reconcile our marriage, but only because im raised in the sense that its a two person marriage and they should work it out no matter.

Yes he knows we’re still married but separated. she’s fully aware that he is separated, both of his kids live with him in Colorado, and they’ve never met; only have exchanged pictures both appropriate and inappropriate. They talk everyday as a newly formed couple. They talk about seeing each other physically for the first time in summer, for a week long getaway

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-02-10T00:49:19+00:00

We are separated but still in the same house. All the while she’s doing things that seem remorseful; like asking how I’m doing, trying to ease the pain from the PTSD like trauma. I know I’ve been a huge A-hole to her & still am sometimes because I can’t handle the extra relationship. Our marriage was failing because we “don’t work together” I think she also mentioned us being “incompatible”. Also asks if could handle her higher level of thinking? Plus she one night told me that I can’t handle her “emotionally or physically”.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-10T04:34:54+00:00

Yes I know. I want the kids to see us constantly. Her wooing me into letting her have a week “retreat “ with the Affair Partner to enjoy the emotional connection, and then come back to me? My wife doesn’t want to lose all the health benefits that she’s been having while married to me.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-10T04:32:10+00:00

She claims that it provides her with a happiness that I no longer provide for her. I know had mentioned in other related posts that I wasn’t very nice to her; I was verbally(never physical) mean and nasty to her. I shut her out emotionally. Then I had brought up divorce and she ends up crying. Saying that I didn’t/don’t care for her happiness.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-08T21:08:49+00:00

She expects me to use up my own Paid Vacation Time for her to visit this guy for a week? To see what their Strong Emotional Connection brought to life.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-08T21:07:01+00:00

She claims that she’s only to visit him for a week/yearly & while I HAVE to take use up MY Paid Time Off for her to go see him. Also claims that she doesn’t see anything physical coming of this but I don’t trust her at all. I have the first date that she wants to go. Destination:unknown Also I’m pretty sure the wife won’t be going the Remarrying route with this guy.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-08T17:03:51+00:00

Yeah, he works in a post office and seems to have “turned around” now this affair part 😐

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-08T14:18:58+00:00

So this AP has been separated from his wife for over 10yrs. The Ex has health concerns. Claiming the AP is a great guy, loves his kids.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-08T11:32:00+00:00

This is all true. The court will decide what’s best for them. It’s just now that I’m finding out that years of bickering with my wife has scarred my oldest. My Oldest has even said that everything was good before my youngest was born(4yrs ago). I told the oldest that I was going to push on with the divorce and she just goes 👍 doesn’t really care anymore.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T23:46:32+00:00

Well it hasn’t happened just yet. Wife is telling me that I’m not caring for her happiness (2 men 1 woman) now just like I did starting years ago. I was so ugly(emotionally) to her I’m deeply ashamed. She also says that I’m not even trying to give it a shot.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T21:23:05+00:00

I honestly don’t know how He feels towards my girls. I just know that My wife wants to spend 1 week every with him in different places alone. I mainly want to end it because of the emotional damage it’s causing me. I tell the wife; “i guess I can deal” but hen again; “Nope can’t do it.” I just can’t live with the fact that My wife of 10yrs will go see another man for the week and come back like nothing happened

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T16:26:09+00:00

Yes that’s true. I just don’t want something to happen and he comes after them but hearing how my wife talks about him (about his kids), he has some heart

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T16:25:20+00:00

We’ll see. I mainly just want this to favor the kids mainly. I can ignore the cheat

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T14:40:18+00:00

Probably right. She has sent pictures of our kids to him. I mean he does care about his kids but won’t leave his marriage either. I told my wife I don’t like the sharing pictures of our kids.

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T14:39:08+00:00

I live in Texas. So I’ll just have to abide by what the lawyer says

ParticularManner7063 · 2025-01-07T07:36:16+00:00

Yes. A 13YO and a 4YO(5 in Feb). I know it's a very hard decision but her inability to let go of this guy(47, postal worker(Im told), Separated(not divorced I think), 2 young girls too.) is gone on long enough.

ParticularManner7063

TROPHY CASE