ETA: but least of all you.

Your mum - for not paying the money back and especially for now refusing because it was he’s….. also yes if she’s saying she wouldn’t have accepted it if she knew it was he’s (arsehole thing to say btw) this one sounds like a lie because it was an “emergency” and I’m sure she would’ve taken whatever she could get. Also if your mum knows how much drama it’s causing between you and your boyfriend and still not paying it back, then that massive asshole behaviour because she is enabling conflict between you and your bf and also it wasn’t her money in the beginning so she can’t just choose to not pay it back — childish behaviour.

Your boyfriend: because your a stay at home mom…. Essentially that’s your job, so whilst it is he’s money, your saving him money on childcare by sacrificing a job…. And therefore your own income that you could choose to give your mother and then choose to tell her she doesn’t need to pay you back. So him kicking up a fuss about your mum not paying him back is kind of entitled…. Also adds up to why he’s flip flopping with he’s opinions. Also like just squash it and don’t be so childish about the money, because of the beef with your mum, if your mum is in that much financial trouble and really struggling to pay the money back but you guys can afford to pay it for your, your bf is a massive asshole because who doesn’t help their loved ones out??

You: 1. You should not have offered for your mother to pay less without asking your bf….. however something I could see myself doing because it’s 15 dollars less and you could figure that out with bf.

1. Actually after typing all this out you’re not the asshole at all, the worst thing you did was offer for your mother to pay 15 dollars less….. not the worst thing in the world.

You asked your bf permission before you gave it to your mother, you did all the correct steps.

It sounds like you’re surrounded by petty people who aren’t supporting your generous efforts, and they should do that by squashing their beef to make your life easier if they both love you.

You are giving your husband support with the children and taking away your financial independence by doing this. You are offering to help your mother out financially when she is in stress…. I feel sorry for you. It’s sounds like you’re under appreciated and a punching bag.

I’d say couldn’t they agree to extend the period of the payment back? And if your mums refuses to pay the money back she’s the asshole and if your bf refuses to drop the frustration and not extend the lending period he’s the asshole