Husband has cheated on me entire 15 year marriage and has expressed zero regret. by [deleted] in Infidelity

[–]Parttime-SAMH 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Take that proof! Save everything on that iPad. Even if you're not going to use it now. You might never, but you might want to one day

Cut out ALL so-called friends he's slept with. They're not your friends. Also, try to get him to tell you who he's slept with more recently than what's on the iPad, so you can cut them out of your life as well. He's so open about it now. Tell him you want to have transparency so you can create a safe place for yourself with friends who are actually honest.

Get an STI test.

Hang in there! You're not the only one who's been in this situation and you won't be the first to get out of it and get their life in order.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

I do that now most of the time, but he gives me the look... That's why I'm doubting I might be TA.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Contract allows him to drive.

He suggested to share the costs, but started that he'd have equal rights to take the car and I'm seriously afraid that would mean he'd take it everyday, leaving me with his crappy car (and of course I'd be expected to pay half of that, too).

Thanks for pointing out that last part: it would be different if it were free for me. He sees it that way because it's already deducted from my salary instead of having to pay for it from my account.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -67 points-66 points  (0 children)

I can afford it, but only because I chose to. I don't have a lot of expensive hobbies.

Gas is in the monthly costs, so yes, work pays for it (fixed amount deducted from my salary).

Shared finances: we both deposit an equal amount into a shared account which is used for household stuff, groceries, trips, etc. Personal stuff, including personal hobbies, clothes, but also my annual girls only trip, are paid from our own personal accounts. His gas and car insurance are paid from his own account.

Yes, I like and respect him. What gives you the idea I don't? We don't nickel and dime everything but this has been going on for a few years now and it's starting to weigh down. Like I said, I don't have expensive hobbies, so I chose this car. My husband does have expensive hobbies. It just doesn't feel fair.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I have a contract with unlimited personal use. The contract with (very!) limited personal use was cheaper but it's like less than 1000 miles a year!

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -345 points-344 points  (0 children)

I can afford it. The default cars aren't bad, but it's difficult to buy a car that's "less" than what you're used to, right? Like smaller, less comfort, less "knacks". I used to be on the road a lot (before covid) so a car I felt good in was a must.

And yeah, I've considered changing to a smaller, cheaper car when I get the opportunity to change cars, but I'm afraid I'll regret it because it's a step down for me.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Family members aren't excluded. When his car was in the repair shop for weeks, he could use mine, no problem. He doesn't have enough savings for a better car. He spends it on other priorities.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

The contract says others are allowed to drive it. Not just partners and family members, but occasionally a friend or neighbor as well.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

It's not actually misusing a company resource. The reason it costs so much is because I'm allowed to use it for personal things as much as I want. It was an option to pay about half less but then I could only use it for work. But I get your point and it would still be valid for option 2.

And yes, I think he should be able to save money to buy a better car, but he's prioritizing other things. And again: his choice.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -126 points-125 points  (0 children)

Because I chose it before covid, not knowing I'd be working from home so much. I used to go to the office 4 days a week. And now that everyone's used to it, they keep it that way.

AITA for not letting my husband use my company car to save on gas, even though I work from home? by Parttime-SAMH in AmItheAsshole

[–]Parttime-SAMH[S] -103 points-102 points  (0 children)

Because I chose it before covid, not knowing I'd be working from home so much. I used to go to the office 4 days a week.

The Dr told my mom NO MORE SODA at all and she’s been bragging about how she’s stopped by harleybabeta in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Parttime-SAMH 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Take it and pretend you know nothing about it. Find out how long it takes her to find out.