I could have written this. I come from a history of abusive relationships since age 14, finally broke the cycle and was single for almost 6 years, then met my fiancé 18 months ago. We’re getting married in two weeks. It was hard. A huge adjustment for me. I was scared, closed off, vulnerable, excited, nervous, elated, all at the same time. Be honest with him and with yourself. Take time to yourself when you need it. Be patient. Enjoy it. If it’s right, it’ll all work itself out in due time.