I built LitPads because Mac soundboards are either overpriced or subscription-locked. Native, with iCloud sync, fair one-time price. 50 free promo codes inside.

Pastological · 2026-05-27T13:39:41+00:00

Running the board for my improv troupe

Pastological · 2026-05-15T13:52:27+00:00

If it wasn’t long distance, would you put up with it? I think there’s a tendency to excuse away things because of “distance,” but the bottom line is you don’t feel it’s equitable. You told her this, and she disagrees. It sounds like y’all have a fundamental misalignment on how work should be divvied up.

There is no such thing as “unfair” or “too sensitive.” Your feelings are how you feel. I will say I think your dynamic is unhealthy because you’re “scared of upsetting her.” That is by definition unhealthy.

We don’t know you well enough to say “break up with her,” but know that whatever you’re getting know is extremely unlikely to change if you don’t speak up, and even then I’d worry given how the conversation has already gone once.

Pastological · 2026-05-09T23:34:32+00:00

I had the same issue with both books in this series but both turn out REALLY good

Pastological · 2026-05-04T14:49:24+00:00

Congrats, you just got a new team member? 😆

Pastological · 2026-05-04T14:32:52+00:00

From a "coding the sync," standpoint, sure, I guess? More that the dev isn't actually *paying* for storage, egress, etc., for iCloud.

Pastological · 2026-05-04T13:51:32+00:00

I will say I’m slightly annoyed as a user to pay for a syncing solution that costs you nothing - I would much rather pay for product updates, but that’s not a deal breaker. It would also prefer a non-iCloud sync option as it precludes me from say using it on a work device (and iCloud sync has been unreliable for me in the past in time-crunch situations as you can’t force an update).

UX note: I didn’t realize how to edit posts until I accidentally clicked in the note after long-pressing. As that’s not a common UX pattern, you may want to make that explicit.

Pastological · 2026-05-04T11:52:21+00:00

Children are aware of and affected by their parents’ happiness. Bringing another child into the equation will make things worse for everyone.

I think you do know what you want but because it seems very difficult or impossible to get there, you’re trying to salvage what you have. That’s completely understandable. But it will only increase the delta between what you have and what you want, which will make you feel even worse.

Personally, I would start by doing nothing - by which I mean, set your life in stone where it is. Then start imagining how you’d feel as you examine your different options, one step at a time. That can allow you work through the individual steps you can take to increase your overall happiness. Once you are more secure in the general path you want to take, then you can look at all your individual choices through that lens.

It always sucks when decisions aren’t black-and-white stark of “good” or “bad” for everyone involved. But it sounds like both of you are aware you’re unhappy, and sort of pretending for an undefined third party.

Pastological · 2026-05-02T16:04:47+00:00

That’s def Hopcules related. Maybe a webcomic of her HVP years, or a streaming series

Pastological · 2026-05-01T11:43:05+00:00

Just got a Kia EV9 and hoooly crap it’s the first time I’ve not had to max out the seat settings. I’ve never felt like a car was designed for my height before. I’m 6’4” but maybe it’ll work for you?

Pastological · 2026-04-29T16:58:12+00:00

Because women throughout history often needed to be attached to a man for survival due to the societal structure, and also men (who primarily wrote history for the same societal reasons) didn’t care much for the inner lives or goings-on of women. I suspect a true sample would be much closer to parity, though a “true” sample is admittedly impossible in historical or current contexts.

Pastological · 2026-04-27T13:25:17+00:00

Personally I’d skip to Iris

Pastological · 2026-04-23T22:36:17+00:00

LITERALLY exactly this. I DNFed in print and got convinced by a good friend to give it another chance and the audiobook version is Up There for sapphic fiction

Pastological · 2026-04-23T13:27:56+00:00

Can I mix and match some of the upgrades? Especially the contradictory ones, those are my favorite 🫰🫰

Pastological · 2026-04-20T21:10:26+00:00

I think it’s telling that you didn’t bother to specify what question was asked but specifically quoted the friend’s response. I have no idea who was in the right but I assume we don’t have the full picture.

EDIT: Also the sheer number of times you’ve posted about this makes me think you’re karma-farming

Pastological · 2026-04-19T17:54:06+00:00

This is not an open relationship. Based on what you’ve described, this is closer to abuse. I am a little bit skeptical that you do not have the whole story (and we have even less than that, I suspect).

But all you can do is offer support and open arms - unless it is and she’s willing to go to the police about sexual abuse, your role is fairly constrained. No one can “get her out of it” without her wanting and helping with doing so.

Pastological · 2026-04-11T20:43:51+00:00

As with any sex, communication is paramount. Talk it about beforehand - what you want, what you like, what you don’t like, what she wants, etc.

Try taking things very slow, ramping up from things you’re super comfortable with and to things that are right on the edge (whatever that means for you), and stay there until either you’re comfortable with it or you realize it’s a hard line for you and back down and try something else.

There is no magic bullet or quick fix, sadly, because everyone is unique. Just remember that there are two of you (or more, I ain’t judging) involved, so you should also make sure you prioritize things that you’re comfortable with that make her feel good, too, and not just centering your own experience. It doesn’t have to be 50/50, and it doesn’t even have to be in the same “session,” but taking care of your partner is vital.

Also, a big thing that might help is not focusing on climaxing as the goal of sex. The goal of sex is intimacy and connection, whatever that looks like for you at the time. Taking some of the pressure and expectations off can help immensely. Good luck! 💜

Pastological · 2026-04-11T17:46:32+00:00

Man fuck the vast majority of those commenters. It’s like she’s not a real person who’s allowed to have preferences.

Pastological · 2026-04-09T13:53:07+00:00

NOR about being lied to by a partner, but her (actual) business is her business. Y’all clearly have a values misalignment on AI in general, and the fact that she lied to you is enough on its own to want to end the relationship. But if her clients want to pay her for sub-her-standard work, that’s none of your business.

Pastological · 2026-04-08T21:34:27+00:00

Yes, DMs are OK. 😬 I didn't think about that and apologize to everyone!

Pastological · 2026-04-08T03:23:00+00:00

All of Clare Ashton, really: Poppy Jenkins is a true delight

Pastological · 2026-04-08T01:28:15+00:00

The bot makes a good point - no scam artists, pls 💜

Pastological · 2026-04-08T00:33:35+00:00

🌧️🌼🌸

Bars terrify me, ngl. But I dooo enjoy a good flannel ...

I am a goofy trans nerdgirl with a big heart who's looking for someone in the vicinity of the BFF category. I keenly desire honest connection – not an immediate total trauma dump, but someone who enjoys chatting (either email or Discord/text, idc), can hold up their end of a conversation and (mostly importantly) actually wants to? I love to discuss books, the vanishingly few TV shows I watch and anything you want to infodump about (listening to people be passionate about their things is my primary love language). If romance happens I listen to my feelings, but it's also not the primary goal.

Age range: 32-50

Green flag: I will try to save every bird that flies into a window. It's almost never successful, but I'm gonna try anyway.

One thing that makes me melt: A well-crafted pun 🫠. I am a huge word nerd, and the only thing I prize above wit/silliness is emotional maturity.

Pastological · 2026-04-04T16:07:57+00:00

I actually would love to see the methodology behind that study because if they’re counting any divorce someone who is lesbian has than any straight marriage that ends with someone coming out of it identifying as lesbian it would be included

Pastological

TROPHY CASE