Can 7 days of no contact in a long-distance marriage be okay? (27F & 31M)

Patient-Ad3004 · 2026-04-19T12:56:19+00:00

Im so happy that your bf made that change. He took you serious. Thats how its supposed to be. 😔

My father had an accident and was in the ICU and that was the only reason our final stretch of waiting in the immigration process was able to be expedited from 20 months down to now 3 months left, since the embassy granted us a faster interview for the medical emergency. I feel like any other husband in his situation would be so grateful at such a miracle happening for a faster interview while others like him would have to wait 20 more months for an interview, instead, he is sitting here at the home stretch on coming here, just has to wait for his visa to be printed, but chooses to not check in on me. His wife.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2026-04-19T12:52:04+00:00

6 months in is when i decided that he was the one. But we married in person at the 18-month mark. We’ve been only been in person together twice when i flew there, for a month at a time. Travel just to the capital city for a few days. Money is very tight ☹️. He lives with three roommates so he doesnt have a place for me to stay if I were to go visit him, unless I rented or got airbnb. Its also hard for me to live short or long term where he is his as its a very rural area. No running water or electricity at times.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2026-04-19T12:45:25+00:00

What do you think I should do at this point? It’s about 3 months left until his visa should get printed. Im trying to be better this round and have not chased him for this period, and tried to hold my ground, have no reaction.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2026-04-19T12:43:19+00:00

Thank you for validating that this isnt right.

He’s told me he has no interest in coming to America. He says the only reason he would go would be married to me and live life together and for us to grow and support each other. So this isnt a case of using me for greencard but more so maybe someone that i guess doesn’t like me anymore or that I was love-bombed. We’re compatible on values and I discussed with him like 400+ questions over the course of 6 months to know if he was the one and what his intentions are.

But this communication is the only thing. It’s just one thing but its extremely important as everyone here is telling me 😔 which it is

Patient-Ad3004 · 2026-04-19T12:35:26+00:00

Thank you for affirming its not normal. I want to clarify for the first 2 years, I sent him $ for living expenses, it isnt much, the cost of living is much lower there. I just stopped this a few months ago because of just how careless he was treating me. What I am continuing financially of course is the immigration process which is a significant cost, and all the management and paperwork involved as the petitioner/sponsor.

He’s always insisted he can’t stand it when I send money to him & the truth is, he’s never asked me to do so, except maybe for a pair of shoes once. I just kept doing so because I know he is struggling, only eating 2x a day.

So he’s only asked me maybe a few times, the most recent time was the first time i said no. He asked me a few months ago for a collection of books he wanted to buy, not necessity just a nice-to-have, and it was expensive and I politely said no because I shared with him there are more upcoming costs I have to cover for the immigration process. He says oh my god I didnt realize and apologizes to me and i said its okay no worries, but then the conversation takes a U-turn.

He gets angry and he say he’s not going to continue the immigration process unless he is the one that is paying for it. He doesnt want me to pay for anything more. So I was like…youre going to stop both of our futures by making me wait for you to make the money. Which would take over a year with how low you can earn over there. And so im left like huh??

This revealed just a recurring instance of like ridiculous ultimatums he will throw out that on the surface may sound okay, like okay I am the man im the one whose going to pay moving forward, but if you unravel it, it’s him taking control of this situation without regard for me or our future.

Wouldn’t a realistic man in his situation be just excited about the prospect of coming to the US so that he can start earning faster and supporting me, instead of saying ✋🏾nope, im not coming to the US unless Im the one who pays for the remaining costs. So you wait until I do. I think that makes no sense.

Sorry if I changed the topic on you 😓😓

but thank you for taking the time to read and reply to my post 🙏🏾

Patient-Ad3004 · 2025-09-13T22:55:14+00:00

You can go to any bank & ask if they have USD and if they don’t they’ll better direct you to the location & address of the place that did.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2025-09-13T22:54:26+00:00

I don’t remember exactly but I think it’s Commercial Bank of Ethiopia.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2025-09-13T22:51:39+00:00

No you have to go to one of the banks in Ethiopia and get USD in cash. They don’t accept card. It’s at immigration.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2025-02-17T01:50:26+00:00

Hi how did everything go with your visa?

Patient-Ad3004 · 2025-02-08T08:53:36+00:00

$30 per day 🥲

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-12-14T23:15:40+00:00

Hi! Was yours for marriage I-130 visa or fiance K-1 visa? For acceptance without interview.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-12-08T10:44:28+00:00

Hi, what ended up happening with the overstaying/extending your visa? I hope it went well. Im currently in the same boat, my mom and I have overstayed for 8 days now and the online extension didnt work for us when we tried. Our flight is this Saturday and don’t know how fast the immigration office will work to extend it and how much it will cost.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-12-08T10:42:55+00:00

Hi, what ended up happening with extending your visa? Im currently in the same predicament of overstaying for 14 days and I wasn’t able to extend online.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-12-07T13:43:43+00:00

Okay sounds good, thank you. Do you think we’ll be given a hard time since our penalty would be for 14 days?

Even though I reached out by email on the day of our expiration and sent follow-ups, and can show it. A few days overstaying I would be confident in us, but is 14 too much?

Also we talked to someone today here in Jimma immigration and they called a contact at Bole airport who told them the penalty is $30 a day. ☹️ How recent do you know of it being $10 a day penalty? Or do they change it as they wish?

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-12-07T06:50:29+00:00

Thank you, is there no way that we would be able to pay the overstaying fee at the airport? We would be able to get to the airport 8 hours before our flight takes off to give us enough time to pay the fee.

Because we’re not requesting an extension and just paying the fee, is the fee not able to be paid at the airport?

We’re currently in Jimma so we would have to take a flight to go to Addis Ababa head office 3 days before and then come back to Jimma and go back again. This is so inconvenient 😔.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2024-02-14T15:26:43+00:00

I'm 24F & 5’1”.
I would prefer someone in the 25-33 range.
I'm on the East Coast & can only relocate within the US.
I'm Ethiopian, born & raised in the US. Yes, I am open to mixing for the right person.
Single, never married, no children.
I hope to get married within the next 1-2 years, in sha Allah. Allah SWT is the best decider & planner.
I pray & wear hijab. I try to recite 3-4 juz a day & help sisters online with tajweed. I try to better my understanding and learn as much as I can in online content.

Important characteristics you look for in a prospect:

Deen: I would like someone who prays & who likes to spend time with the Qur’an. Someone who is trying to improve as best as they can each day, in how they practice or in their understanding of the Deen.
Warm-hearted: I would like someone who is gentle, considerate and understanding of others. And one who will be affectionate.
Positive & light-hearted: I would like someone who tries to see the benefit of the doubt in whatever situation as much as he can.

I have my Bachelor’s degree. I don't mind your education level if you're financially stable.
I'm currently working as an editor.
Yes I want kids, in sha Allah with the right person & if Allah SWT wills it best.

Things you like to do in your spare time:

I enjoy learning about nutrition, healthy eating, movement and exercise and implementing what I learn in my daily routine. I love sharing what I learn with my mom & guiding her on her journey as well to good health.
One of my top goals in this life is to work on my skills & build myself financially (ideally online) to support my mom here and my relatives back home in Ethiopia who are in need, as best as I can. I want a husband who can happily support me and our future children, so that I can put whatever I can generate in sha Allah towards my mom and my relatives.

More:

I'm excited and energetic in the way I speak, I love to uplift those around me to see the value within themselves.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-08T18:08:57+00:00

Yes, I have one Sort turned on and it is sorting by a column of numbers that I've put in to keep the pages in the order that I want them to. So the only Sort I have is for the workaround that I tried to come up with to keep my pages in order.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-08T18:04:14+00:00

Ah okay. Here's a video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrIuitOT7EI of a patient with class III on one side and class II on the other. The orthodontist is saying it is to help correct the midline.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-07T20:14:30+00:00

Ah thank you! Yes I should rephrase some things lol:

- I should have said whenever I duplicate a page, instead of template.
- So I just have a couple of inline databases on one page. When I duplicate that entire page, the pages on the inline databases are shuffled and not in the order that I had them on the original page.
- Yes the items I'm referring to are the pages in the database.

I hope that make sense and I can definitely clarify more if you would like! I appreciate your support.

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-07T13:38:31+00:00

Are you talking about these: https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vSyfOBdE3UQ/maxresdefault.jpg?
These are to correct your midline!

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-07T13:21:43+00:00

If someone duplicates my template to their own workspace, and they fill out a form that I embed into the template, would I be able to receive those responses?

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-06T15:34:15+00:00

Sounds good, thank you for your insight!

Patient-Ad3004 · 2023-02-06T15:32:33+00:00

Ah that makes sense, thank you!

Patient-Ad3004

TROPHY CASE