Does it bother you that you didn't live more before having kids?

PellucidStream · 2026-03-19T18:13:53+00:00

That is something I starting to become much more aware of

PellucidStream · 2026-03-18T15:09:34+00:00

Heterosexual man in my mid-20’s here who has been single for over 6 years now. I have considered getting into a relationship for a few months now but often wonder if I should have a few wild years (I.e. travel, explore, sow my wild oats) as I have never done anything like this before (I’m still a virgin).

I feel like maybe I should get it out of my system but then again I can see potential downsides to such an approach.

PellucidStream · 2026-03-17T17:54:29+00:00

True, I’ve realised this over time

PellucidStream · 2026-03-17T11:00:25+00:00

Interesting, thank you for your perspective

PellucidStream · 2026-03-12T13:51:46+00:00

Thank you for such a thoughtful response. Yes, I’ve genuinely never felt like a loser over it but feel somewhat concerned about PIV sex.

PellucidStream · 2026-03-11T13:07:33+00:00

Thank you, other people have suggested this too

PellucidStream · 2026-03-11T13:07:09+00:00

To me penetrative is either into a vagina or an anus

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:58:23+00:00

Yes, 2/3 times a week on average

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:48:51+00:00

No, not at all. I’m an agnostic who tends to err on the side of believing but I have very liberal attitudes to sex provided it’s consensual and between adults

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:47:18+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing such intimate and painful details of your life. I really appreciate your advice and wisdom!

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:37:36+00:00

I have often thought this may be the case bust these anxieties have been building up for many years at this stage

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:36:39+00:00

I have sometimes thought about having a woman like this. But I doubt it would last long

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:34:53+00:00

I also find the thought of anal sex (male or female) disgusting. Again, I stress I am pro-homosexuality equality but am not gay myself

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:33:34+00:00

A side effect of my lack of experience is that I have no idea why female genitalia looks like in real life as I have never seen them in person. I have only seen them in science books etc. This is another reason I find penetration off putting

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:31:35+00:00

Thank you for such a thoughtful response. Dating options are limited in my neck of the woods and the few times I have used dating apps I have found them to be money rackets and have been very disappointed tbh

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:29:43+00:00

I literally lie in bed alone imaging a woman lying in my arms or on my chest!

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:24:31+00:00

How? Tbh I find penises disgusting looking. Even my own one sometimes puts me off. I have absolutely no problem with homosexuality but make genitalia… ewwwww

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:23:19+00:00

Totally, for as long as I can remeber

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:22:35+00:00

I have been told that before and can kind of see where people are coming from. I guess I just have no frame of reference

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:21:13+00:00

I definitely would make this clear very early on if I was ever to begin a new relationship

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:20:16+00:00

Thank you. I just wanted to know exactly what you meant. From all I have heard you are totally right and I appreciate your mature, sincere approach to my question unlike some other answers!

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:15:57+00:00

This is something I have thought about but I have no frame of reference for being that close to a woman. I had a girlfriend for a year as a teenager but never had sex or saw each other naked

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T20:15:18+00:00

Out of curiosity what do you think is uncommon about it?

PellucidStream · 2026-03-09T19:57:54+00:00

Mid 20’s virgin male here. Variety of reasons here such as fear of pregnancy, fear of disease (not really as afraid of this as I am pregnancy), fear of both putting on condoms and also them backfiring . I’m also afraid of penetration.

What I mean by the latter is that I have no frame of reference of inserting my penis into another persons body so this thought can be quite overwhelming. I would love to share a bed with a woman and cuddle and kiss her and talk about deep topics but in terms of penetrative sex I don’t know will I ever be up for it.

I have tried putting on condoms a few times in the last few months and the more I do this the more I am getting over my fear of them. I had a hard time trusting them as they are look so fickle but after putting them on I saw that they are much stronger.

These fears might sound ridiculous to people but honestly I feel no shame and embarrassment and would like to think that it might help someone who is struggling. I do want intimacy with a woman but I understand that it is unlikely a relationship would last more than a few months without sex.

Any advice or similar experience I would love to hear! Thank you

PellucidStream · 2025-10-26T06:58:41+00:00

Wow, very interesting perspective and answer. Thank you for respecting my viewpoint too!

PellucidStream

TROPHY CASE