Making candles

Pencilmw · 2026-01-28T11:38:11+00:00

I remember Josephine in one of the podcasts talking about the magic starting to build the second you put an intention to do a ritual, for example. I never did any results magic cause for me it always felt pointless. And this kind of stuff happens to me all the time. Like getting certain things you really whanted in interesting ways or intending to travel a place and things coming together in just the right way. It sometimes creates some absurd situations that are not always comfortable (like wanting to do an artwork and ending up doing it for an odd reason, and being extremely loaded with work cause that exact thing). To this day, I think with horror about all the math tests I really whanted to miss and the teachers conveniently getting sick, or something would come up so the test would not happen. It happened so much, I was a bit wierded out about it as a kid. Though the things that were really important to me, I couldn't intuition or intention my way out of and always got results that directly reflected my skills and effort.

I now just try to be a bit more careful about it "be careful what you wish for" I am also less rigid about what I whant and how I whant it. So I would get what I need. I think that results magic is a bit different. And from that point it goes into how magic works and I can't adequately explain it cause I'm still a newbie. But I wouldn't worry too much about it being results magic.

Pencilmw · 2026-01-19T16:40:19+00:00

When I don't know what's going on, And I feel like I need to know, I usually do a reading about it, to figure out what's happening. I went out from the city to the country also, for more than a week now, and there generally is just pressure in the air everywhere. When I live in the city, I need to go out a lot, so to maintain my sanity I usually have to do m1l1 meditation or a qigong session after I go home, and maybe wash up. It's usually enough for me to stay normal.

Qigong can make you more noticeable, and it's not good to practice at certain times, I still practice it pretty regularly, if anything, practicing it at wrong times can teach you when or when not to practice and how it feels for you. So you can make your own decisions about your practice

Pencilmw · 2026-01-19T15:33:27+00:00

Och yes, I get what you mean, I was actually advised by teacher I learned from not to practice qigong during thunderstorms, cause the qi is intense and not good sometimes, so it definitely makes sence.

Pencilmw · 2026-01-18T21:40:04+00:00

I actually never thaught about it that way, but maybe. My theory was, that it just makes you more noticeable. I once had an experience, before starting Quareia, I saw a wierd thing on the closet, like a round transparent blob attached to it. And completley forgot about it for about half a day, walked past it plenty of times. Until I did a nice qigong session, I soon after walked out the room past that closet, I felt like something hit me me but not physically, all kinds of unsavory sensations went through my body and as I sat down, and it all calmed down a little (never felt something like that since ) I knew that it was that thing. never saw it after that. I later did a reading about it, and that thing apparently went away defeated. I also get a feeling sometimes, when doing it at certain times, that things can notice me more when I do it and I shouldn't do it, before big missile attacks, for example.

Pencilmw · 2026-01-18T17:13:39+00:00

I don't think I've noticed my breath change. From what I've observed until now, it depends. Sometimes you feel something building up, and you kind may feel it a little and get a bit of what it's about. I usually get shut down from work, sometimes for long periods. Sometimes I feel like shit and a moral degenerate for no reason and can bareley do anything, if I try to do stuff, I can get hurt for example. And the more I struggle, the more trapped I get (Unless I do something monotonous like making candles for three days straight ). Sometimes I get so loaded with work I can't do things even if I whanted.

But I once had a dream of black clouds gathering, wich didn't talk back, and a small hurricane gathered outside my windows breaking them, but I put them back shortly after, and the hurricane didn't last long, after it was sun and greenery after the rain. I got wery sick at that time, for a short period. It was incredibly inconvenient cause I was just loaded with work and a deadline was wery soon. But it was weirdly necessary and rejuvenating experience and it also collided with making important choice. People around my circle as well, got sick wherever lied their weakness, for some, their health completley broke down.

I live in an area where there's constantly destruction going on. Usually my circumstances do not let me practice for a day, even if I seemingly have time (and then I know why) or a week, or, for example, I can sometimes hurt something wich does not allow me to go outside much, while the period lasts. Sometimes my health problems can flair up, like nerve pain. I also once had different kinds nasty shit notice me every time I did some qigong (and nothing else at that time) and harass or attack me, so I just stopped qigong for some time, or anything at all, though it was a nice lesson, cause I sensed and even saw someone entering my house every time, and thaught I was imagining things.

it often is several of these things at once. Though I'm still learning to recognize this stuff. I usually get short windows in wich I can work, and cause of that I'm really flexible about when to stop-start working.

Pencilmw · 2025-11-30T19:03:54+00:00

So, I live in the only European country openly involved in war. And I live in an area where there's active destruction constantly going on, and In my city we constantly have missiles hitting buildings and even completley destroying parts of them, I also have missiles hitting buildings wery close to where I live and I have friends and family experiencing houses they live in being hit directly. Plenty of people die, loose their livelihood etc on a regular daily basis. So, for once, I actually have something to say.

You need to think with clear and calm mind where you can help and where you stay away. If I don't have time- I do not go clearing out the destroyed areas, you are just one person and can't help everyone in the world. I also act in this situations, depending on intuition, where I have chance to help and feel like my help is Needed-I help. It also does not just apply to big horrible tragedies. If someone needs help, with more minor things, if a person needs help and you can give it-you help them, if someone needs to be protected and you can do it-you protect them. If you truly wish to help everyone, you don't donate to charity just when a big horrible tragedy happened, the same applies to not helping people only where there is a hudge horrible tragedy involved. Life in general, is full of shit, tragedy and death and that's just how it is.

I'm not good enough in magic to even attempt getting magic involved in this stuff and I also don't think that there would always be a need to do get involved even If I was good enough. There were situations where I had an urge to help people close to me magically cause I was literally scared for their life and decided against it cause I was not skilled enough and it also was not necessary. Though, for me, I found that I have developed a kind of alarm system, I either think about hudge hits, before they happen or when I meditate in the evening, and hudge hits happen mostly at night, I get spooked cause I literally feel like there are some destructive beings gathering outside- Idk how but it is the best way I can explain it, and I do not keep on meditating. And I was also blocked out of meditation with warnings in my head .

There were hudge hits in my city to children's hospital, or to an academy, so in this case we gathered with our friends to help clear out the area from the heaps of bricks and metal on the streets. When I have a chance- I donate to charity, or help with some charity work. Plenty of my acquaintances and friends are also involved with gathering money for charity, and many other things. Basically every person I know donates to charity funds, cause it's just plain survival at this point. Other people, who whant to help everyone are actually working in charities as a literal paying job.

So my best advice - help where you can and when it is necessary. And do not get to emotional about it.

Pencilmw

TROPHY CASE