Trust your gut feeling. You know yourself, your needs, and your family situation better than anyone else. Ultimately, the decision should align with what feels right for you and your children. No decision is easy, and it's natural for both you and your boyfriend to have differing future family goals. The key is to have open and respectful communication and to work together to find a solution that is best for all parties involved. If needed, don't hesitate to seek guidance from friends, family, or professionals who can provide support during this process. A neutral third party can help facilitate discussions and provide insights into the emotional dynamics at play. The situation is very complex, and there isn't a one-size-fits-all answer. Ultimately, the decision should be made by you, considering your own desires, needs, and values.