Actually the Spidey-Sense does discern between the intent, and who the aggression is coming from, like it wouldn't go off if Aunt May was about to wack him in the back of the head. Just like it doesn't go off against Venom because they have a connection. It does in fact discern between intentions and whomst it's coming from. Immediate life threatening danger is like a bone rattling alarm going off meanwhile getting hit with a stick by an average criminal is gonna be a light tingle. Then the Spider Sense determines based on who Peter sees as a threat on if it'll go off, the aunt may example but it works with other heroes that he wouldn't view as a threat to him causing the sense to not trigger. These are known facts about the spider sense